My Next 30 Years

An important announcement

2010-04-17T17:09:00.000-07:00

The following is a public service announcement (PSA) on behalf of Pregnant Women of America (PWA) intended for all Non-Pregnant People of America (NPPA)!

Attention all NPPA, please do not look at any of the PWA around you and tell us that we look "fat", "large", "huge", "ginormous" are "rapidly expanding", "must be having twins", "bigger than I was last week", "popping out", "carrying mostly in my hips...or butt..or boobs..or any other part of my body"! Please refrain from touching, commenting on, flicking (yes, some of you NPPA are FLICKERS!) or staring at our protruding belly buttons. We, the PPA, realize that some NPPA have never been pregnant and therefore do not understand the alien-like transformation that our bodies are undergoing. You get SOME leeway for your less than kind statements. However, some of you NPPA, are former PPA, and have forgotten (sometimes so very quickly) the rage of hormones, the feeling of looking at yourself in the mirror and not recognizing the strange person staring back at you! You former PPA, get very less, a very marginal amount of leeway for your stares, flicks and comments!
Please understand that during our reign as PPA, we are experiencing an uncommon, extremely LARGE surge of hormones! (And no, the hormones are not acceptable topics of conversation either) Therefore, if you feel the need to comment, stare, flick belly buttons, or rub our tummies "for good luck" you are putting yourself at risk for some sort of hormonal retaliation. This could include, but is not limited to the following; the PPA under attack may burst into tears before your very eyes, leaving you to look like an evil NPPA making said PPA cry; you may be screamed at, kicked, mocked for your size, have your hair pulled, your eyes gouged out, or most likely you will be left to clean up the mess of a sobbing PPA, the result of your unkind words or gestures.
Thank you in advance for adhering to the suggestions in the proceeding PSA!

As the author of this Public Service Announcement, 2 confessions must be made. During the author's time as a NPPA, said author made TWO major blunders to PPA's...As a high school junior, my youth pastor's wife was VERY pregnant with her 2nd child, as she walked into the gymnasium filled with high school students, I made a very loud, very obnoxious quacking sound, referencing her very pregnant waddle...so not cool!
During another time in my life, before having ever been pregnant, a co-worker was expecting her 3rd child. In an elevator FULL of people, I very loudly questioned her claim that she was carrying a single child, and gave her the oh so kind advice, to have her Doctor check again, to make sure only one baby was residing in her ginormous pregnant stomach...so, so, SO not cool!

something different...

2010-04-16T08:28:00.000-07:00

I have been slacking on my posts lately, I just don't have much to say. The best way I can sum up our lives right now is to say, the days seem to last forever, but the weeks are FLYING by! Does that even make sense??
Anyway, check this out if you're in need of a laugh out loud moment...it's absolutely, positively, one of my favorite and funniest moments on TV! Enjoy...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DqwzvtjeYBQ

Adios!

2010-03-24T13:05:00.000-07:00

I finished reading this book last week, and let me tell ya, it kicked my keister! (Is there a proper spelling for keister...Keester? Kiester?) Anyway!
It was so good, I was really excited to read it, but I had no idea how much it would bring some aspects of my personality to light, and how convicted I would be by reading it. My book is very, very, highlighted, so much of it spoke to me.
Here's the main thing I took from the book. Beth Moore gives a lot of examples of the ways insecurity tends to make fools of us. Crazy things we do and say in the moments where our insecurity is at it's height. She talks about how it affects our friendships, our marriages, our relationship with God even. And it got me thinking, how does my own insecurity manifest itself?
My conclusion? When I'm feeling insecure, I become EXTREMELY judgmental. Examples? Well sure, I've got a billion of them.
When I'm feeling insecure about my weight (most of the time), I "size" up every random woman I come across... "am I heavier than her".."surely she's a bigger size than me", etc..etc..

When I'm feeling insecure about myself as a mother, I judge the behavior of kids around me... "my kids are at least SITTING in the cart, those kids are running through the store"..."at least our kids aren't climbing all over the waiter/waitress like those kids"...etc..etc.

When I'm feeling insecure about my marriage, I judge the marriages around me (and usually with little or NO correct information to go on!) I make assumptions that the other couple (sometimes complete strangers!) has nothing as good as we do in our marriage.

When I'm feeling insecure about my relationships, I judge the quality of relationships around me, you know, the ones that I don't have a CLUE about! Relationships that I have no idea what the inner workings are, the dynamics, the REALITIES!

So, how have I taken this aspect of insecurity and tried to better myself? Now whenever I get those rambling judgmental thoughts in my head, I catch myself. I stop and ask, "What is it that I'm feeling insecure about?" 99% of the time, I have found that my judging is coming from my own insecurity. I HATE being judgmental. I really, really hate it. It's such a trap, and so not useful for anything. It's a trap that I fall into often, and a trap that I'm trying to avoid more and more these days.
It's so much easier to love others, to be more open to others without the false assumption/judgmental thing going on in my head. I have a long way to go, but if this is the only thing that sticks with me from the pages of this book, I think it's a good thing to hang on to!
I've recommended the book to so many people, and I think you should get it and read it, too! You'll love it, and maybe it'll kick your keester too! (Keister, kiester??)

"March"-ing along!

2010-03-12T11:33:00.000-08:00

What's happening in our world right now...

*I'm just about finished with the 2 Esther (a study by Beth Moore) groups that I was leading through the fall! The study was so good for me in so many ways. I'm trying to decide which Beth Moore study I'll tackle next. I like doing them as my every day devotional because they really bring me through the Word...they challenge me and cause me to think and grow in ways that I've not found with any other devotional/study author.

*Speaking of Beth Moore, I'm reading her new book, "So long, Insecurity" and I am loving it! I've told pretty much every woman I know to pick it up and start reading, because I can't think of any woman who would NOT benefit from reading it. It has convicted me and opened my eyes in so many ways, I'm just about finished and I'm sure it's one I'll read over and over.

*Baby #3 is growing and moving and doing everything he needs to be doing! I've forgotten how fun/crazy/weird/sometimes annoying all of those movements can be...the annoying part is that no matter what I'm doing, lying down or sitting up, anytime I change positions something about the way he moves just makes me have to ...umm...pee! We're still searching around for baby names, we'll take suggestions!

*SPRING IS HERE! I don't know if it's technically Spring or not, but we're down to 2 very SMALL patches of snow in our yard and Tuesday the boys and I spent 2 hours playing at the park. It felt so good to be sitting outside, feeling the sun on my back and watching my boys romp around in the mud puddles. Now all I need is a good, strong thunderstorm!

*I've seen a ton on facebook and in some of the blogs I read and talked with some of my friends that people are starting their outdoor running again...or for the first time. I'm a little jealous! I haven't done any running since I found out I was pregnant and at this point it probably would be a bit dangerous for me and the baby, since I'm so out of shape AND clumsy these days. I miss running. I plan to get back to it after I have this baby and hopefully one day I'll see my feet again...

Mama knows what mama likes

2010-02-27T11:17:00.000-08:00

In the midst of all the cold and snowy weather, I've forgotten the few reasons that I L.O.V.E. this time of year! In the previous 2 years, I was working so hard on losing weight and getting in shape, I didn't enjoy my favorite March goodies, but this year...Bring.It.On!
Any guesses on what it is that has my taste buds all riled up?

#1

In case you live on another planet, those, my friend, are GIRL SCOUT COOKIES! My 2 favorite kinds, Samoas (I knew them as Carmel Delights in my Brownie Years) and Tagalongs (also known to me as Peanut Butter Patties). I'm so thankful these only come out once a year, otherwise I'd be in trouble!

#2.
...and this delightful little guy is a Shamrock shake from McDonald's! I love the minty goodness of this sucker and while I've had a ...ahem...FEW...of those delightful Girl Scout Cookies this year, I've yet to indulge myself with one of these bad boys. I sense one coming up in my near future, though. One time a lady in front of me at McDonald's ordered a Shamrock shake with 1/2 shamrock and 1/2 chocolate...I've not tried that before, but I can't imagine it would be a bad thing!
Happy Spring-ish! :D I'm off to have my blood sugar levels tested now ;)

Boy oh Boy oh Boy!

2010-02-15T16:03:00.000-08:00

The Gray's will be seeing more Blue! Our ultra sound last week gave us a very good shot of our new baby boy to be! We wanted to come up with a special way to reveal the sex of our 3rd child, and I loved the way it unfolded. Chris and the boys came with me to the Dr's and into the ultra sound room. First, I have to say, even in the 2 years since we've had Mason, the technology of the ultra sounds has advanced tremendously! We had one 4-D shot, which I've never seen before, and it was amazing! You can actually see the baby's face..the skin, the shape of the nose, the eyes...it's crazy! We asked the technician to whisper to Levi the baby's sex and then Levi told us.
When he turned around and said "It's a boy", I just was overwhelmed. I really thought that I would feel disappointed or discouraged if it wasn't a girl, but once I heard "boy", it didn't matter at all. I think the technician started to worry because the tears just kept streaming down my face throughout the rest of her scans. I was just happy!
I never had a brother and while I was around my some of my boy cousins a lot, I was never close to them. It's such a joy to be surrounded by my own family of men! I'm totally up for the challenges, the surprises, and the action that 3 boys will bring into my life.
We've not decided on a name yet, which doesn't surprise us at all. Levi was going to be named Caleb, all the way through the first 8 months of pregnancy. Then, scouring through a baby book, I came across the name Levi and fell in love with it. It took all the way through the delivery to convince Chris, but obviously, Levi won out. We didn't know if Mason was a girl and, of course, we had the girl name figured out, but the only boy name we thought we might use was Owen. When he was born, Owen just wasn't right. It was nearly an hour after he was born and we were STILL trying to come up with a name! Chris started reading through his list of boy names, and as he was rattling off names, he said "Mason" and I looked at him and looked at the baby in my arms and said, "He's Mason" and so it was.
I ran into the Family Christian Store today and they were having a great sale on some books. I picked up, "Raising a Modern Day Knight" and "Wild Things..The Art of Nurturing boys". Now I just have to figure out when I will have time to read the books, you know, since I'll be so busy raising my boys!!

Productive Disobedience

2010-02-05T06:24:00.001-08:00

Oxymoron? Not in this case. Earlier this week I had given Levi a few things that I needed him to do to help me out. The list included things like, getting his dirty laundry IN the basket instead of around it; putting his bed-time buddies (a blanket and dog) back in his bed; cleaning up legos; etc..
He did all of those things, except only 1/2 way or less. When I asked him to put his laundry in the basket he threw 1/2 of it in the basket and the other 1/2 he shoved where I couldn't see it. When I told him to put the bed-time things away, he threw them right in the doorway of his room, not on his bed as I had instructed. Any task I had given him he completed less than fully. I explained to him that partial obedience equals disobedience. (In a 4 year olds language, of course)
That got me thinking. I do that all the time...to God. I justify a lot of sin because I'm not being blatantly sinful. Here are some of the things that God brought to my mind that I've been doing lately that fall short of pleasing Him.

"It's not really gossiping...I'm just trying to explain how I feel about the situation with this other person"

"It's not really gossiping...I'm sharing a PRAYER REQUEST"
*maybe gossip is something I need to work on!-You think?

"It's not porn that I'm watching, it's just the story of one guy falling in love with a dozen girls and spending LOTS of time in hot tubs with them"

"I'm not lying, I'm just making the story a bit more dramatic by adding a few details, but the IDEA is the same"

"I don't think it's stealing, I look at the clerk's oversight of my box of diapers as a "blessing to our finances" !

"I'm not being a glutton, I'm pregnant, therefore I need to EAT as much as I want as often as I want"

There are a lot more examples I could give, but I think I've exposed enough of myself for one day!
Do you ever find yourself doing this? Have your kids taught you any good lessons lately through their disobedience? What's on your mind this week?

Simple Pleasures

2010-02-03T12:44:00.000-08:00

You know those things that just make your heart dance? Those small gestures, gifts, moments that leave you feeling secure, loved, cozy? What are they? What are your simple pleasures? Kelly at Kelly's Korner posted about this yesterday and I've come up with a few of my own simple pleasures...

1. A Starbucks peppermint mocha on the day of the first snowfall
2. An unexpected, unprompted "I love you mama"
3. REAL mail! A card, a note, a check..I'm not picky, ANYTHING with real handwriting on it :D
4. A surprise phone call from a distant friend
5. Hearing these elusive words at the dinner table: "wow, honey (or mom) this dinner is really good!"
6. Christmas
7. Clean sheets on a tightly made bed
8. Empty laundry baskets and and empty washer/dryer
9. Vacuum lines on the carpet
10. Long conversations with friends
11. Stolen kisses w/ my man!
12. Laughing till it hurts
13. Re-connecting with a friend I've not been in touch with for a while and feeling like no time has passed
14. A good book!
15. BLOG COMMENTS :)

So, do you agree with me on any of these? Are yours completely different? Share...

A boy and his tacos

2010-01-28T19:38:00.000-08:00

My boy LOVES taco night at our house! I love taco night at our house, because it's about the only meal that I can prepare that will bring pure joy to our dinner table. This particular night (about a week ago) I made tacos for dinner and Levi, 4 year old, 31#, little Levi, ate 3 1/2 Tacos! And they were loaded...meat, cheese, tomatoes, white sauce (sour cream) and "tasty red sauce" (salsa).
If he eats 3 when he's 4 years old...how many will eat when he's 16, and what will that mean for my grocery budget??

I think this was #3, and we also LOVE Sonic happy hour...1/2 off drinks!

Mason loves taco night too, he's just not as passionate as his brother concerning the tacos!

Randomings

2010-01-16T13:00:00.000-08:00

**I hit the 17-week mark of pregnancy #3 TODAY! So far, everything is normal and we'll be finding out boy or girl on February 9! I am so excited to know, I truly have no idea. Statistically, it should be a boy, but I never liked math, so maybe I'll fail the statistics!

**Chris was in England for 6 days last week. Don't feel sorry for me, though! My mom came on Monday night and spent pretty much the whole time he was gone with us. She's so great at keeping the boys busy and giving me lots of "me" time. I loved it!! I also LOVED having Chris back home on Friday afternoon. The poor guy is pretty jet-lagged and exhausted, but we're just staying home this weekend to help get him adjusted.

**While my mom was here, I had the opportunity to have dinner with my oldest (not by years, but amount of time) friend Jill. We met at PF Chang's in Lansing and had a delicious dinner and great conversation. Jill and I went to school together from Kindergarten-graduation and have been friends since about 4th or 5th grade. (Minus 8th grade, right Jill?) It's so nice to have a friend who has traveled life with you. There is no need for long background explanations about family dynamics or why we make the choices we do, we've been there through it all together. We do not see each other much, but we have one of those wonderful friendships where we can pick up right where we left off. I love that in a friend!

**I have a confession...The Bachelor/Bachelorette shows are one of my biggest guilty pleasures. I was so excited when this new season started 2 weeks ago, you have no idea. I know the show is pretty smutty and not really great moral watching, but I love it. My love may be fading...the bachelor on this season is an airline pilot. He took one of the girls in an airplane and flew her around some snazzy scenery, while in the background, "On the Wings of Love" played...seriously?!?! Cheese, anyone? It was almost too hard to watch..I should mention that the subtitle of the season is "On the Wings of Love", it seems like they are going to play this pilot card for every thing they can...gag!

**Do you memorize bible verses? Do you have a system for doing this? It's something I've really wanted to start doing, but I've always put it off or not gotten very far with. Any suggestions or ideas on how to get started and successfully pull it off? Should I do one a month? Two a month?

**I guess that's all for now. We're enjoying a quiet Saturday at home. My jet-lagged husband is napping and so is my wild little Mason. Both of my boys were awake at 6.45 this morning...we are an 8.00 family, but I guess they didn't get the memo on that today! We kept making them go back to bed, but they never went back to sleep...grrr! Enjoy your weekend!

What holds you back?

2010-01-09T05:45:00.000-08:00

I may have mentioned before that I am studying Esther, (Beth Moore's study) and LOVING it! If I haven't mentioned it before, well I'm studying Esther using Beth Moore's study and I love it! This past week, we watched one of the video sessions which focused mainly on when Esther tells Mordecai that she will go to the King and she says, "If I perish, I perish." Meaning, she will literally risk her life and go see the King without an invitation in order to fulfill what Mordecai has already told her, might be her destiny, and save the Jews from complete distruction. (Esther "Who knows but that you might have been placed here for such a time as this?") If you've not read the book of Esther in a while, or ever, go read it!
The most profound thing (to me) that Beth Moore says in her video is that we can let our fear keep us from our calling. Our destiny. I can think of so many examples in my life where I have let fear keep me from doing something that might have changed a path in my life or a path in someone else's life. I firmly believe that none of my choices or times when I have let fear rule over me change ANYTHING about God, His plan or purpose for my life or anyone else's. God is God and His plan will be fulfilled, the issue is whether or not I will let fear keep me from being a part of that plan.
Stick with me here...
Last night Chris and I went on a wonderful date night and saw the Movie, The Blind Side. Such a great, great movie! What struck me the most was Sandra Bullock's character. She did NOT live in fear. From opening her home (a ginormous, beautiful home) to a large, wandering, African-American male, to hunting down his mama in the projects, to confronting a group of men who were threatening her and her family when she was very outnumbered. I kept thinking throughout the movie that this is exactly a case where fear could have kept her from her destiny...and in that case, her fear could have kept Michael Ohrer from his destiny.
I pray for courage like that. I do not want to live in fear any longer. I don't think until this week, I've ever fully realized that fear does have it's hold on me. In.Everyday.Life. I don't tell friends who don't know Jesus about his amazing love, for fear of losing that friendship. I don't try to befriend the other parents at Pre-school for fear of being rejected. I don't always obey the promptings of the Holy Spirit to reach out to a friend or stranger because I fear being misunderstood, seeming too desperate, trying to hard, being rejected.
It's time to kick fear in it's rear and live like Queen Esther, making my motto, "If I perish, I perish." And the reality is, MOST, if not all, of the things in my life that fear keeps me from, will not put me in a position where perishing is even an option!
So, I ask, What is fear keeping you from?

A peek inside my crazy brain!

2010-01-05T18:42:00.001-08:00

My thought process for the past 5 days, no joke!
(Completely out of nowhere) Day 1: "Woah, I really want an egg salad sandwich...do I even like egg salad?...it seems like a lot of work to make, maybe tomorrow"
Day 2: "What should I have for lunch...EGG SALAD SANDWICH...do I even like that stuff, it seems like a lot of work to make, maybe tomorrow I won't be craving it anymore"
Day 3: "EGG SALAD SANDWICH...I know if I make it I won't want to eat it and it will be such a waste of eggs, which the boys love and eat all the time...oh, it sounds so good...when was the last time I had an egg salad sandwich...do I even like that stuff?...maybe tomorrow"
Day 4: "Darn, I really want an egg salad sandwich...I guess I should figure out how to make it...ugh! I can't stand the thought of boiled eggs right now...is there somewhere I can buy one? Maybe tomorrow"
Day 5: "SERIOUSLY! This craving will not go away! I've gone through the process of making one, but I still see myself in the end not wanting to eat the stupid sandwich...Craving, GO AWAY! If I still have the desire then for sure tomorrow, I'll make an egg salad sandwich!!"

Does anyone have any idea how to make the darn thing, because obviously, it's what the baby wants? Is it just eggs, mayonnaise and mustard? HELP!
Also craving Mt. Dew, much easier to satisfy!

Back in the Saddle Again!

2010-01-03T12:42:00.000-08:00

3rd times a charm, right? After my 2nd loong blogging break, I've decided to have another whack at it. (And apparently, I'm putting as many cliche sayings as possible in this first post back).
In order to ease myself back into the blogosphere, I've stolen this survey from one of my favorite blogs, babybangs.blogspot.com, the answers are mine, of course! Welcome back to my blog!

...As if you needed to know more about me...

1. What is your favorite thing to snack on while your blogging?
Since I've not been much of a blogger, I'll answer the question more generally...my most favorite night time snack is a bowl of cereal. I'll usually eat whatever we have on hand, but every time I get groceries, I am on a search for the best night time cereal snack...my usual go-to-Frosted Mini-Wheats, although I wish both sides were frosted!

2. What is one thing you wouldn't want to live without?
My family

3. Beach, Mountains, or Farm? Where would you live if you had a choice?
Absolutely, without a doubt, the beach!!!

4. What's your least favorite chore/household duty?
Laundry, it's my arch enemy

5. Who do people say you remind them of?
Good question, I really don't know. Based on looks alone, I'm sure they would say Giselle, you know the supermodel...OR NOT! :D

6. Prefer parties and socializing or staying home with the fam?
I like a really good mix of the 2. I love being out with friends, but I crave my time at home with our little family as well.

7. What's your all time favorite movie?
For Love of the Game, with Kevin Costner and Kelly Preston. It's a baseball movie and when it came out I was a HUGE baseball fan (I still like the game, but I'm not as dedicated as I was then) It's still one of my favorites

8. Do you sleep in your make-up or remove it like a good little girl every night?
Oh, I sleep in it!

9. Do you have a hidden talent or a deep desire to learn something that you've never had a chance to learn? What is it?
I have always, always wanted to sing good enough to be on a worship team or in a worship band. I can not sing to save my life, I'm terrible! I'm fairly certain that God knows I would not be humble enough to ever lead people in worship.

10. What's one strange thing you're really good at?
Making people laugh

11. What first attracted you to your spouse?
The font he used...you know, because we met on the internet! (See, that made you laugh, didn't it?)

12. What is something you love to smell?
I cannot answer this question without first saying that I have NEVER smelled so many offensive things as I have since I've been pregnant. My sense of smell is more sensitive than it's ever been, and I've vomited twice just because of an odor. Now, something I love to smell, is this little tiny hat that my giant boys wore home from the hospital after each of their births. I've saved it in a special place and once in a while I'll pull it out and sniff it...one good whiff of the hat and I can almost feel my babies in my arms again!!

13. Tell something about you that you know irritates people.
Silence makes me uncomfortable, and because of that I am a terrible interrupter of people...especially on the telephone!!

14. When you have extra money, what's the first thing you think to do with it?
Go out for dinner somewhere nice without the kids!

15. Are you a silent laugher or a loud laugher? What makes you laugh the hardest?
I'm loud and if I laugh hard enough, an occasional snort gets thrown in. Chris Gray makes me laugh the hardest. Especially when he is just being a DORK!

16. Where is your favorite place to shop?
I'm a Target girl. I love it for everything, and especially for the Starbucks located within.

17. What's one thing you'd do more often if you had more time?
I would write more and read more!

18. Are you a big spender or frugal?
I'm not very good at being frugal, but it's one of my goals for 2010.

19. Who is your favorite character of all time?
Fozzie the Bear

20. Would you want to be famous?
Maybe a little famous for a long time, or a lot famous for a short amount of time

So, there you have it! I hope to back with a bit more regularity, but I'm making no promises this time!

Mind Blank!

2009-10-17T13:08:00.000-07:00

I've been starting and stopping so many posts lately, I'm driving myself crazy. I love blogging, and I've really enjoyed doing it, but I'm in a total mind freeze lately. Each time I type something, I get tired of reading my own words...blah! I'll be back soon, I just need some good material! Any suggestions? Anything you're dying to know? Topics you'd like me to tackle for you? Anything? Anyone...anyone...Bueller? Bueller?

The One With All The Running

2009-09-29T05:57:00.000-07:00

**The first person to guess how I came up with the name of this post will receive a 5.00 Starbucks gift card**

Do you remember this post I wrote back in May? It was all about how I had started running, I was really enjoying it and it was something I NEVER thought I would do...remember?
Well, this past weekend, I had a chance to prove to myself that 1) I can actually start something and stick to it 2)I can actually make a goal for myself and not only accomplish, but exceed that goal 3)Running is amazing!
On Thursday evening, I left my boys (including the hubby) at home and headed off to Akron, OH to participate in the Akron Marathon. 2 people in our group were running the full marathon; 2 were running the 1/2 marathon, and 5 of us were doing a full marathon-relay style.
My leg of the relay was 6.3 miles, and I was third leg. Might I remind you that 6 months ago, I had started the running thing by running for 30 seconds, walking for 1.5 minutes for 20 minutes. I moved up the running chart and struggled each time I increased the running time and decreased the walking. So, here I was, ready to go at it for 6.3 miles of RUNNING! I had been training and was fairly confident that I would be able to complete the 6.3 miles in 72 minutes.
My friends, I am here to tell you, that not only did I RUN the entire 6.3 miles, I did it in 66.23 minutes!! It was so much fun! The entire weekend was a blast, for too many reasons to list, but accomplishing something I set my mind to was an amazing feeling. I just don't stick to much of anything. (IE College!!)
I'm not sure if I have the tenacity, time, or strength to ever do a full marathon, but I am really hoping and planning to accomplish a 1/2 marathon sometime in the next year....that would be an amazing feat for me!
I could not write all about this weekend without mentioning how amazing the friendships and laughter were. I had the opportunity to bunk with a stranger (although many people knew we would love each other) and as we said good-bye to each other on Saturday evening, we were like "summer camp sisters"...you know, the crying, the promising to write, the clinging to each other...it was something like that! One of the greatest things God gives us is friendship, and that was experienced to the fullest this weekend, it was really, even greater than the running thing!!

*I REALLY wanted to post some pictures, but I can't get them to work*

Why I love fall...part 1

2009-09-17T07:54:00.000-07:00

Soup, it's what's for dinner! This is one of the reasons I love fall...
I love soup! To me, it's a great comfort food, and I would eat it a lot more often, if the men in my family felt like it was "manly" enough to constitute a meal..(Insert manly grunting noises here)!
I found this soup recipe at the end of last winter, and loved it, and yesterday's crisply warm-ish, fall-ish day was a perfect day to start my fall soup-fest! The recipe is from the Cooking Light Fresh Food Fast cookbook. I highly suggest you try it soon! (And let me know what you think!!)

Cheese Tortellini and Vegetable Soup

1 (14.5) can diced tomatoes with garlic and onion undrained
1 (11.5oz) can condensed bean with bacon soup (cambell's) undiluted
3 Cups water
1 (16oz) pkg frozen Italian style vegetables
3/4tsp. dried Italian seasoning
1/4 tsp. black pepper
9 oz. pkg fresh cheese tortellini (I use the Buitoni, I have used the whole wheat, but the regular is better)
1/4 Cup grated parmesan cheese

Combine first 6 ingredients in a saucepan, cover and bring to a boil over high heat. Add pasta; reduce heat to medium. Cook, partially covered, 7 minutes or until pasta and veggies are tender. Stir in cheese.
6 servings...1 1/3 cups/serving

And in case you're counting...
201 calories; 4 fat grams; 5.4 grams fiber

Enjoy!!

If you have a soup recipe that you love, share it in the comments section!!

It's not even Kindergarten, for Pete's Sake!

2009-09-14T17:07:00.001-07:00

Today I woke up with a familiar pit in my stomach. A feeling I remember experiencing so many times as a kid, usually once a year, late August-Early September. The dreaded "first day of school nerves". Only today, instead of for me, the nerves were ever more intense because I was sending my boy off into the wild frontier of ... PRE-school!!
There were a lot of big fears that came with this first day of school...what to wear;will other people talk to me; will I be a cool kid this year; will the teachers like me; will I know anybody...and those were just the things I was worried about FOR ME, not Levi!
Levi's first words upon waking this morning were, "Mommy, are you going to be my driver to school?" "Yes, of course I will" "Will I be in my carseat?" "Yes, of course you will!" "ON THE SCHOOL BUS?" The poor guy, all this hype about school and he doesn't even get to ride the bus!
We arrived at school, Levi's excitement never waned, and started walking up the sidewalk of dread. With Mason on my hip and Levi holding my hand...or rather ME tightly gripping LEVI'S hand, we made our way into the building.
The teacher came out to greet all the parents and children and I totally, completely lost it! The tears just started falling. Levi looked up at me and I turned my head away, can you imagine if he, who was so brave and excited looked up to see me completely falling apart! I made my way into the classroom and helped Levi find his name tag, pin it to his shirt, and he looked at me with a big smile and said, "Can I go play now?" and that was it, he was gone...leaving me and a puddle of tears in his dust! One of the teachers smiled at me and said, "I think you should go now"...uh, yeah, you think? Since I am the only person, children included, with crocodile tears filling my face!
Mason and I left, went to the park to hang out with Lindsay and Ayla, and I was fine. When we went back to pick him up, I was receiving many sympathetic looks from the other parents, and I know they were just waiting for me to lose it again...I bet they had a pool going on over at the "cool parents table", but I didn't.
As soon as the door opened and Levi ran over to us with a huge smile on his face proclaiming, "mama, I didn't cry today!", I welled up again, but held it in! We came home, I gave my boy his favorite lunch, PB&J and we cuddled up on the couch for a bit, and suddenly, with my big boy in arms so proud of all he accomplished on his first day out of my nest, all was right with the world again.

A long letter from my mind...

2009-09-13T13:01:00.000-07:00

Dear Summer 2009,
You Rocked my socks off...and that wasn't necessarily a good thing...
You kept your hotter than hades temperatures far from us, and we enjoyed such pleasant weather all summer long, for that we are certainly grateful! Our days were filled with hanging out with so many of our great friends...

...eating lots and LOTS of ice cream, sometimes a little too fast...

...many days of silliness, laughter and smiles came along with you sweet summer of 2009...

...two lovely vacations; one to Mackinac in early July (click the link to read and see pictures about that), and a recent family get-away to Pappa Mike's in Cinncinnati and then the 4 of us went to Traverse City for a few days...

Yes, Summer of 2009, you were very, VERY good to us! Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go crawl under my covers and avoid tomorrow like the plague...because, tomorrow this boy...
is leaving my little nest and heading off to pre-school, and frankly, I just don't want him to!

Sincerely,
The clingy, crying mother I never thought I'd be!

5 years!

2009-09-04T11:49:00.000-07:00

5 years ago today...

...I woke up with my 5 bridesmaids (my sister, 2 sister-in-laws (well, they weren't officially sister in laws until later that day), and 2 of my longest, closest friends)
...We went to Visions salon in Novi to get our hair done
...I danced in the bridal room with my Mother in law (to be)
...I clung to my dad's arm as he walked me toward my love
...I cried through most of the ceremony and did not want to let go of Chris' hand (I think I was still afraid he would change his mind)
...we rode in an old car with the top down through Brighton wearing sunglasses, and listening to strangers cheer for us
...we danced the night away at Crystal Gardens with 130 friends and family members
...we had a chauffered car take us to an airport hotel where two young boys offered to take our luggage to our room for us, since we were "just married"
...we declined
...was one of the best days of my life!!!

In the past 5 years we have...

...added 2 boys and a dog to our family
...been on 2 cruises
...upgraded cars 3 times
...painted 4 rooms
...gone to 2 different churches
...parasailed in St. Thomas
...made new friends
...lost some old friends
...fought
...made up
...laughed...laughed a lot

...played 677 documented games of cribbage
...learned to be parents
...battled through post-partum depression together

In the next 5 years we...

...will laugh...a lot...it's what we do
...will fight some more
...will make up some more
...might be able to move into a bigger house with a Yard!
...will keep figuring out this parenting thing
...hope to travel more
...will play more cribbage (and maybe, just maybe, I'll take the lead!)
...might, maybe, possibly, who knows...add to our family...maybe?
...will challenge each other to walk closer to God
...will keep falling in love...(awwwww)

Happy Anniversary, Chris! I look forward to what lies ahead for us! I love you (more today than yesterday, but not as much as tomorrow...) :D

It's the little things...

2009-08-24T19:01:00.000-07:00

...A full tank of gas after he drives my car...

...bringing me unexpected ice cold glasses of Coke Zero.....

....Taking the boys outside to give me a few moments peace...

...that make me love this man truly, madly deeply!

Dream Dinner

2009-08-21T06:27:00.000-07:00

Obviously, I'm a foodie. I don't think I need to expand on that any further, but just for re-iteration...I love me some food!!! Last night I was preparing for our girls night out pool party, looking for some questions to have handy, just in case the conversation ended up lagging...fyi: whenever there is a group of women together... lag of conversations...not so much!
ANYWAY, I came across this question and thought it would be fun to throw out to you all and get your answers...

You are selected as guest of honor at a dinner, and are allowed to invite 4 famous people to attend your dinner and guaranteed their participation, who do you invite?

A note especially for my mother-in-law, as I'm already hearing her answer in my head...You can't say "my family is all I need for a dream dinner"...Love you MIL, but I'm on to you and your ways!!
So, here are my 4...
Ashtan Kutcher- He could "tweet" to his 3million followers that he's at dinner with Tonya Gray and 3million people would google me, find my blog, and then I'D be famous...plus I'm sure he'd provide some comic relief
George W. Bush - For so many reasons...I would love to hear all that he has to say about life outside the White House; inside the White House; His proudest moments; etc..I think he'd be very interesting to listen to
Will Smith - Eye Candy...need I say more?
Billy Grahm - Someone's going to have to pray for this messed up dinner party!! Also, I'd be interested to hear what he thinks about the Church in America today, among many other things.

OK, so there's my 4? Who are yours?

Remembering a Remarkable Woman...

2009-08-17T09:47:00.000-07:00

With me on September 4, 2004

On August 5th, 2009, my great-grandma passed away, and I lost a major part of my heritage. I don't know many people lucky enough to have a great-grandmother that they remember, let alone have in their lives for 30+ years.
Since the day she died, I've been writing this post in my head over and over, trying to think of the best words to put together a tribute to someone so special. At her funeral, my dad (her grandson) and 2 of his sisters shared their memories of a grandma who was far beyond just the title "grandma" to her grandchildren. It was said many times over the 2 days of visitation and funeral that she was "the family matriarch...the glue that held our family together".
Most, if not all, of my memories of holidays as a child revolved in someway around Grandma. Many of my Christmas mornings were shared with her, as she usually spent the night with my family and woke up with us Christmas morning.
My grandma was strong...she was not tall or big, but she had strength. She was a widow for over 20 years, and lived alone until the last 5. She kept a remarkably clean home, and even moved her furniture once a week (it was on rollers, of course) to clean under, behind and over it.
She survived breast cancer, the loss of her husband and son, the depression and many life altering changes to her and her family.
Her laughter was contagious...the first thing I thought as I stepped up to her casket for the first time, was how much I will miss her laugh. She had this cackle that just echoed through any room. She loved to be teased and tricked. My sister used to call her every year on April Fool's day and try to sell her windows, siding, roofing or shutters. Sitting on the other end of the phone, I could always hear her say, "Jessie, is that you, I knew you'd be calling today", and then the cackle would come.
She loved her family well. Do your remember this post I wrote about the sixth love language? Not until Grandma passed away, did I realize where I got this passion for food from. Grandma loved to bake and cook for her family. I spent almost every Sunday with my 7 cousins and aunts and uncles at grandma's house. She would prepare homemade noodles and beef; roasts; and a plethora of cookies, cakes or pies...did you get that I said every Sunday. She never complained (that I know of) and loved that all of us were at her house to eat her cooking. I am now convinced, more than ever, that food is the 6th love language, and I'm pretty sure that was Grandmas dominant love language.
There is so much more that I could say about this amazing woman and the ways that she impacted me are too numerous to mention. I realize how lucky I am to not only have had a great-grandmother in my life, but one whom I knew well and loved much. She certainly will be missed!!

Holding Baby Levi, one of her 9 great great grandchildren!

Thankful

2009-08-03T21:48:00.000-07:00

Tonight I'm thankful for....

this sweet face...

...and this one

....and this one..

These three boys...errr...2 boys and one man are 3 of my biggest answered prayers. I was one of those girls that just wanted to be a "wife and a mom", and sometimes it just baffles me that God not only answered my prayers but he did so in a way that exceeded my biggest dreams and hopes for a family.
I have a wonderful husband, truly wonderful. He is faithful, compassionate, aware of my needs, a provider, protector, encourager and my lover...wooo, is it getting warm in here or is it just me???
With all my heart I wanted to be a mom, and God saw fit to bless us with Levi in a much earlier time frame than we would have planned, but as always, His timing was perfect. Levi is healthy, funny, playful, physical (we're trying to turn that one into a positive trait), a prayer who loves to talk to Jesus, a thinker and quite the storyteller.
Mason came along and when we thought there was no way we could have MORE love to give than what we were giving Levi, Mason's arrival proved us wrong. Mason is healthy, sensitive, a cuddler, emotionally expressive, funny, obsessed with his big brother and equally obsessed with cars (toy cars, cars that drive by, his daddy's car).
I know life can be tough, trust me, I've been there and I'm sure I'll be there again. But man, is it also so sweet! I don't know where you are in your life right now, but if you're struggling with something, feeling like life sucks or just plain down, I encourage you to look at what's good in your life. Maybe your spouse and kids are bringing you down (Hey, been there, too) or maybe you're feeling lonely and wishing for someone to appreciate you. Go find something that makes you realize how sweet life is. Go to a park and take in the beauty that's just there; call your mom, dad, brother, sister just because; pray and ask God to show you a glimpse of HIS love, I can pretty much promise, if you ask Him and you're looking, He will show you!!
If you are feeling down and/or struggling with something, I would love to pray for you. You can e-mail me at tonyagray813@gmail.com, and/ or leave a comment here and I promise to pray for you!

Oh Yes I Did....

2009-07-31T08:10:00.000-07:00

Go to the store in flip-flops and tool around in our our neighborhood pool and never even realize that my feet looked like this...

I remember thinking I badly needed to fix my toes last night and starting the process (by the way, I despise giving myself pedicures, which should be obvious) while watching Real Housewives-Atlanta, and then getting really tired, I do NOT remember stopping half-way through and going to sleep. Maybe I should check Chris' feet to see if I continued on with him...???

Today...

2009-07-29T11:41:00.000-07:00

Today I am..

...out of Coke Zero

...really wanting a Coke Zero

...going to Costco to buy Coke Zero (and other things)

...wishing Coke Zero would pay me for advertising!!

...longing for sunshine

...planning to attend the Beth Moore Simulcast in August with church friends

...looking forward to the Beth Moore Simulcast

...wishing Beth Moore would pay me for advertising!!

...feeling great after running 5 miles (on the treadmill)

...thinking running on a treadmill may be easier than running outside, but I push myself so much more on the treadmill than I do outside

...Struggling to grasp the thought that tomorrow I'm taking Levi to pre-school open house

...reading this blog and praying for this baby mycharmingkids.net

...thankful for my own two healthy boys

...trying to redesign my blog

...thinking I'll be much better at redesigning my blog once I get some Coke Zero in my system!

...what are YOU doing today?

Letters from my mind

2009-07-23T11:06:00.000-07:00

Dear Lady at the Mall Play area:
Are you aware that most of the moms in the play structure spend 90% of their time telling their children to STOP TATTLING! What then, makes you think it's a good idea to tell me 10 minutes after my oldest child pushes my youngest down (something that happens 1.2billion times a DAY), that "your baby was crying (10 minutes ago, a 2 second cry) because his big brother pushed him down over there". Well, thank you so much, let me just grab that mean big brother and punish him right in front of you so you will feel that justice has been served. By the way your perfect child may not be pushing his sibling down, but he's over there licking all of the climbing toys, you know the ones that all the other kids are running on barefoot, and I think he just put a pre-chewed piece of gum in his mouth!

Sincerely,
Big-brother bully mama!!

Dear Lady @ Target,
Listen carefully, there are TWO, TWO photo centers here, right next to each other. While I have 2 patient children in my cart, who are quickly losing their patience, could you please BUZZ OFF! I don't need you standing over my shoulder commenting on my vacation pictures, reminding me that I'm using your favorite photo center. By the way, when you say you'll go away for a moment, so I don't feel rushed...I didn't think you literally meant ONE moment, so I don't know why you were surprised that I wasn't finished when you returned from your "moment". Also, even though I apologized, I really wasn't sorry that Levi kept bumping into you while you were trying to use said photo center, since it was still our turn, and he was trying to get our pictures as they were printing out! Finally, my vacation pictures were way better than yours!!!

Sincerely,
The one with nicer pictures

Dear Coke Zero,
Did you hear that I got rid of facebook once I realized I was facing an addiction to it? Aren't you worried that I might axe you out of my life? In all of your fizzy goodness, I'm downing more cans of you than I should, and I'm starting to take notice...what's that? Oh, right, you heard that I went crawling back to facebook so you're not afraid? Nice...

Sincerely,
The one with no will power

Visions...

2009-07-18T17:54:00.000-07:00

I'm fairly certain this is what he had in mind both times he heard the words: "It's a boy!"

No need for any safety lectures...the car was safely parked in the garage, and note that the emergency break is engaged, and this is the ONLY time the boys have ever been in the car...never unsupervised!! This is a recording..

Lions and Tigers and Bears.

2009-07-16T18:55:00.001-07:00

...except NOT! (because they were all sleeping and not visible enough for a 3 and 1 year old to see!!)
I took the boys to the Detroit Zoo on a whim today. We didn't really have anything planned and I decided it would be a quick and fun way to spend the morning/early afternoon. (It's about 1/2 hour to the zoo, nice and quick!) The weather was great, the crowds weren't too bad and the boys were a blast! They both actually noticed and enjoyed the animals, a first for sure. While I really enjoy spending days with friends, it's always nice to do some outings with just my boys...it was a great day!

This picture is blurry, but he rarely looks at the camera and smiles! (The french fry in his hand isn't hurting either)

Watching4 painted turtles swim in front of them

The closest thing to a monkey I saw all day!

You weren't expecting pictures of animals, were you!?!

Vacation oh lovely vacation!

2009-07-15T12:44:00.000-07:00

Here's a look at our vacation. It was so great to get away and just be our own little family for a week. Enjoy...

This is mostly what we did... Hung out on beaches at different parks and threw rocks! I love this picture of Mason and me (and Levi!)

Mason didn't get the memo that this was NOT a nude beach!!

I see this picture and realize how full and rich and blessed I am!

This is possibly the best picture of the boys we have... I LOVE IT!

The 4 of us!

My 3 favorite guys on Mackinac Island!

Mason and the bumblebee!

Levi's "favorite food"...s'mores!!

My random, crazy, busy wonderful life-in blog form!

2009-07-02T14:11:00.000-07:00

Phew! I can't even catch my breath, we've been going about 100 miles/hour around here, and I feel like I just blinked and we went from April to JULY!?!?
I had intentions to write a nice father's day post in honor of Chris, the best baby daddy I got...and then father's day came and went, and I thought I would write a nice birthday post in honor of Chris' 32nd birthday...and then his birthday came and went! What on earth is keeping us so busy, you ask? I have no idea...
Last week, the weather around here was sunny, hot and clear blue skies, it was gorgeous. We were out and about every day. Swimming with friends in our pool, swimming with friends at a beach, and swimming with friends in their pool, lots of swimming fun! It was so nice to get up in the morning and be gone, drag home 2 tired little swimmers and have a few hours of nap time quietness.
The end of the week brought our Chicago family into town (Chris' sister Rachel, husband Joel and their 2 kids, Payton (3) and Evan (1). We spent most of Friday and most of Sunday with them, while Saturday we had 5 parties to attend, but only managed to squeeze in 3 of them (Sorry, Pat and Adam).
This week has been filled with rain and cold weather...yielding 2 caged up crazy boy animals, which yields one crazy caged up had enough mama!!
We are celebrating the 4th of July with my extended family and then on Sunday Chris, the boys and I are OUTTA HERE! We are going on a vacation, just the 4 of us, camping in Mackinac and doing all the fun up-north stuff there is to do! I'm a little overwhelmed with the packing and planning part, but I'm really looking forward to introducing the boys to my favorite spot in Michigan!
Happy 4th of July!!

Take Me Out to the Ballgame!!

2009-06-24T12:18:00.001-07:00

On Friday night, Chris' company hosted a summer outing at Comerica Park. We decided to bring Levi along for his first Major League ballgame "among the general folk", he's actually been to Comerica one other time for one of our friends' 1st birthday party, but that was high class...in a suite...parking in the Tigers Garage...private elevators, and it was 2 years ago, so he was just about 18 months, too far away for his memory!! I digress...
Anyway, we got to the ball park, made our way to our seats and sat down with our hot dogs, chips and pop ready for a fun night and watching our firstborn get ALL the attention of mom and dad, and experience something that his mom and dad love so much...baseball! We got through 3 innings and decided to take Levi down to the ferris wheel, made our way back and just as we reached our seats, the rain started to fall...and fall..and fall...I'll let the pictures tell the Rest of the Story!!

He was so excited about the game that he conked out as soon as we headed to the park!!
Inside the Ferris Wheel, the cars are all baseball shaped, it's right in the park...pretty cool!

We knew this was a bad sign...and also, not something you want to read when you have your 3 year old in a packed stadiumbut really, Levi and I needed a chance to wear our blue rain parkas, so I was glad for the opportunity!
We left the stadium and took Levi for dessert at Ram's Horn...remember when we were there last??
I don't think he was too upset about leaving the game early...he finished off MOST of the strawberry shortcake and a lot of my hot fudge cake!!
Although, things didn't go as we planned, it was a really fun night and it felt really special to have Levi get both of our attention for the evening. Especially because we knew Mason was having fun with some great friends of ours from church at his own special sleepover!

Books, Brothers,Bawling and Bedheads!

2009-06-19T09:47:00.001-07:00

Books are fun!
Did somebody say Books? I want to read with you, big brother!!

Let's surprise mommy and actually SHARE the reading fun!!

...well, that lasted about 30 seconds...

(The next morning)

Channeling the faux-hawk!!

STOP TAKING PICTURES OF MY HAIR!!!
The best bed-head is meant to be shared among brothers!!
This is his best camera smile...we need to work on that some!!

Keeping Up Appearances

2009-06-17T10:48:00.000-07:00

Remember that picture of my living room a few Monday's ago? It was really, really hard for me to post that picture. Most people who know me well, know that I am FAR, FAR from a neat freak, and that in our house, it's Chris who is the one the mess gets to first. Knowing that this knowledge is fairly common in our circles of friends, I still go to great lengths to have a clean house when I know people are coming over. I recently was mortified when a surprise visitor dropped by in the midst of tornadic conditions in our home. So much so that I nearly missed the blessing of the visit!! At some point I realized that our visitor wasn't coming over to check out how clean things were, and she surely wasn't expecting to hear Mozart playing in the background while Levi and Mason practiced their French lessons and I pranced around in pearls and high heels. THAT would clearly not be reality!! The question I find myself asking is, "what's wrong with the reality, anyway?"
Would anyone love me less if they knew that the remnants of last nights dinner are probably still lingering around somewhere between Levi's chair and Mason's high chair..or that I rarely (as in almost never) make our bed...that sometimes I wash a load of clothes twice because I forget to take them out of the washer before they get a little stinky smelling?
Don't misunderstand me, I certainly believe that these are all areas in need of some improvement, and I do wish that I were better at keeping things in order around here, my intention is not to excuse the mess. However, there are days when this is the REALITY.
If I really desire authentic relationships, and that's really the only kind of relationships I want, (it's too exhausting to do it the other way) then I should be a lot less bothered by the mess, or the kids in PJ's at noon and allow myself to focus on the visit...I can only imagine how much more conversation we could accomplish if every 5 minutes, I didn't interrupt the conversation to spend 5 minutes apologizing for my messy home, dirty kids, and stinky dog!!
So, I'm going to work on being more organized and keeping a better home anyway, but in the meantime if you happen to drop by and can't make your way from the kitchen to the couch, be assured that I'll be embarrassed, but not so much that I'll miss the blessing of your visit and our friendship!!

AHHHHH!

2009-06-15T10:25:00.000-07:00

Six years ago, 2 newly engaged couples packed up 2 tents and more camping equipment than they could have used in a month, and headed off to Silver Lake State Campground for a weekend in the sun and Sand Dunes! The couples had so much fun that they vowed to make it a "tradition", and do the same trip every year...
This past weekend was our fifth year on this camping trip with Chris' long-time best bud, Rick and his wife, Laura. We missed last year because we both had young babies at home and decided it would be best to take a year off, but this year we were right back at it feeling like we hadn't missed a year!
We packed up and headed out on Friday morning, rented a pontoon and spent the day on Silver Lake on Saturday, and came home Sunday. It's just such a great time and there's something about life long friendships (such as Chris and Rick's) that is so refreshing. Laura and I had barely known each other when we took that first camping trip, but over the years we developed a fun, easy friendship, mostly built on making fun of our husband's and the way they still act like they're 12 when they get together.
We laugh A LOT, eat A TON, and enjoy the sweetness of friendship and tradition that God has granted us. We first decided when I was pregnant with Levi, and they weren't having babies yet, that no kids could go on the trip until the youngest one was 5 years old...then we decided this year that no kids can come on the trip ... EVER!! This weekend is built around tradition, we try to keep as many traditions on our trip as possible, and kids would break most of them. We may just have to add another getaway to our summer, so that we can go as families!
Here are a few pictures of our getaway adventure!

Girls can climb big sand hills too! That's me on the left, Laura on the right.

Rick, Laura and I at our campsite...we don't really "rough it"!

"Alone" ...relatively, that is!

2009-06-03T07:02:00.000-07:00

This is what happens when I try to go to the bathroom "alone"....

First...the appearance of objects under the door

then...said object becomes out of reach and the appearance of chubby little fingers accompanied by a small voice, "mmmaammmaa" "hi" "HIIII!

...And once I open the door I know I need to be careful, lest I step on the sweet face of my "intruder"! This is how I find him every time I open the door after my time "alone"!!

FYI: We don't actually keep a camera in the bathroom, but I was anticipating this post so I "faked" the bathroom experience to capture the moment!

Not Me Monday!

2009-06-01T09:41:00.000-07:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

This is NOT what my house looks like, because I am a wonderful housekeeper and would never let my living room get to this state of disaster...and if I did...I certainly would NOT post about it!!

This is NOT my People Magazine haplessly strewn on the floor, and if it WAS my People Magazine, I certainly did NOT buy it because I wasn't able to finish the article on Kate Goslin before it was my turn to load the groceries on the scanner at Meijer....

and finally...this is NOT my empty Reese's Peanut Butter Cup wrapper that was also added to the scanner at Meijer at the last minute. I did NOT buy the ultimate worlds BEST candy EVER, and eat it secretly in the van in the 5 minutes it takes me to get from Meijer to home...NOT ME!!

Deleted!

2009-05-27T13:08:00.000-07:00

I took a huge step today and have decided to delete my facebook account! Yes, I will delete my account. I'm not taking time off, like I have before, I deleted the whole thing. WHY, you ask? I'd love to share my reasons, and they are many, with you!
First, I'd like to say, I'm most certainly NOT trying to start a movement, convince you to delete your page or convict you of anything. This is something that I feel I need to do to better myself and better manage the way I spend my time. I am...was...a facebook addict. I literally hop on and check status updates, pictures, etc...multiple times a day, multiple, as in more than 1, 2 or 6! I'm sure you're wondering why not just limit myself to once a day, take some time off, etc...? I just don't see the benefit of facebook for me right now, so I'd rather just be off it completely..for good!
I've been thinking about this since I read this blog post on Sunday. I've been debating within my ownself if facebook is something that is beneficial to me, and I just don't think it is. I don't think it's something un-beneficial, but I can't see any benefit in it, and therefore no reason to keep it open and having it available to lure me in and drain my time. Time that could better be spent building relationships...real-life, live relationships!
Relationship... this is the word that has been going over and over in my mind as I've been debating shutting it down. One of my biggest struggles lately has been the dissapointment in lack of time to build relationships. I've had more than a few conversations with friends lately, where I've been sharing this struggle and saying, "there's just not enough time in my day to make the calls I want to make, to connect with the friends I want to connect with", yet I manage to spend most of my boys nap times checking in on facebook. And when I say checking in on facebook, I'm not really building and fostering relationships with people. I'm looking at pictures of people I've not even TALKED to since becoming their "friend", in fact, the people I chat with/talk to mostly on facebook, are those who I see on a regular basis.
Make no mistake, facebook has been a great way for me to become reaquainted with people from my past. High School classmates, old church friends, and friends from all 3 of my colleges, and that has been great. But my hope is that I will be able to continue with those people I truely reconnected with and can foster those relationships in other more real ways, more personal ways, and more in-depth ways.
If you are someone who I've reconnected with because of facebook, I really hope you'll keep in contact with me. I'm really not a hard person to get in touch with. My e-mail is tonyagray813@gmail.com. You can always call me, you probably have my number somewhere. And of course, I have this blog, where you can keep up on all things Grays!
I have a feeling this will be more of a struggle than I think, but for me, I think it will be truely beneficial...I hope so, because it will be really embarrassing to request you all as my friends again!

My first Not Me Monday!

2009-05-18T09:59:00.000-07:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

So here are the things I did not do this week:

I did not order and consume 3 tall iced coffees with skim milk and a shot of hazelnut syrup in the span of 5 days! That would not be wasteful use of our money, and since I am trying to be a good steward of what God has given us, I wouldn't even consider doing such a thing...not me

I did not take a child with a stinky diaper to church and attempt to play dumb and try to drop him off in the nursery, pretending to not notice the stink coming from my sweet baby boy's bottom! And I was not upset with my darling husband for passing said stinky child to me and insisting I change the bottom before leaving the child...I would never willingly drop off a dirty bottom to our church nursery!

While playing at the park this week, Levi had to go to the bathroom, but flip out at the sight of the inside of the outhouse. I did not proceed to take him to hide behind some large trees and allow him to pee on the ground. That would be disgusting and I did not do that!

While lounging on the couch on Sunday evening, engrossed in the 2 hour episode of Desperate Housewives (which I don't watch such immoral garbage) I did not reach a new level of couch potato happiness when I realized that The Bachelorette is starting TONIGHT..because of course I do not watch such immoral garbage...NOT ME!!

So, there you have it. My first ever Not Me, Monday! I've loved reading MckMama's posts on Mondays, and thought I would give it a whirl.
Is there anything YOU'D like to confess to NOT doing this week??? Bring it on!

Run, Tonya, Run!

2009-05-15T11:37:00.000-07:00

I never, ever, never, not in my 30 years on this earth, ever thought I would say this, but....

I've been running! Umm...well, jogging, maybe is a better word.

If you know me at all, you should know what a statement I've just made. Whenever asked (although, never asked because, let's face it, I don't even look like a runner) if I ran, my response was always, "Only if I'm being chased!" and since I don't think I've ever been chased, one can easily deduce that I don't run...until now.

It started in the pre-school room at church...isn't that where all great things get their beginnings? A friend was trying to put together a team for the Race for the Cure in Detroit, and asked if I was interested. My friend, and our Pastor's wife, Anne, asked if I'd be interested in starting to run and train for it. Well, I just smiled and nodded and gave it no more thought. But Anne, doesn't know me well enough to know how clueless I am, and she was persistant in getting me running! She even went out with the boys and I for a day of shopping, showing me the gear that would make me a great runner, and gave me a training program to help me get started...and believe it or not, I did get started.

I'm on my 8th week of running, which consists of running for 4 minutes, walking for a minute for 30 minutes. Here's the amazing parts 1) I CAN do it! and 2) I LOVE it! I haven't missed a day yet, I've even run in the rain a few times, gotten up early, and run on treadmills in hotel rooms to keep up with the schedule. I'm not really very fast yet, my pace is about a 10min/mile-walking and running, and I'm not trying to be faster yet, but just be able to run the whole time I need to. We're actually not going to be doing the race for the cure, but I probably will do a race or two this summer, just to say I've been in a race!

So, I'm wondering, if I never would have believed before that I would be running FOR FUN, and loving it...what else have I been limiting myself on??

What about you? Is there something you do that you never thought you would do, or something that you don't think you will ever do, but would like to try sometime??

Wordless Wednesday

2009-05-13T06:41:00.000-07:00

To Blog or Not To Blog

2009-05-09T13:51:00.000-07:00

So, it's been well over 5 months since I've last posted anything on this blog. It's certainly not due to a lack of excitement around here...with my 2 crazy kids and zany hubbs, there's almost always something to post about. Chris and I have even been on a cruise since my last post!
The main reason for my hiatus is because I've been evaluating the purpose of a blogging in general, and more specifically, the purpose of my own blog. Some of the blogs that I read are truly open books into the lives of the bloggers, others are dedicated to the bloggers triumph over trials, and a few are merely for entertainment purposes.
I've decided that I'm going to make my re-entry into the blogosphere, mostly for the purpose of keeping my own journal of all things happening in my life right now. I'm not going to worry or focus on how many people are reading my blog, and what they are thinking about what I have to say...which is a huge temptation for me, to "write what will make me look good...or look like I have it all together...or what I KNOW will make people laugh".
What you will basically read as you visit my blog..daily..weekly...or well, maybe you'll never come back, will be a glimpse into my life..spiritually, as a mom, a wife and a friend, and all the other "hats" I wear. (Although I don't literally wear hats, because unfortunately, I cannot pull them off!)
So, if you keep reading, I hope you enjoy sharing MY journey as I navigate through the 30 somethings, parenting and life in general!

Happy Birthday Levi!!

2008-11-29T18:25:00.001-08:00

3 years ago today, (well, today when I was writing this) I was lying in a hospital bed at Huron Valley hospital, nervously awaiting the arrival of our first baby. We knew he would be a boy, and we knew his name would be Levi. We never could have guessed the joy this sweet boy has brought into our lives.
He was born at 6:07pm on November 3oth, 9lbs 10oz. A big chunky, healthy, beautiful boy. It does not seem like 3 years have passed since that day, but I'm sure it never feels that way.
In October, I posted 12 things I love about Mason, because he was 12 months old...so here are 12 things about Levi that I love (I thought about doing 36, but who wants to read that many??)
1. He loves to sing...he sings all the time, "As the Deer", "You're Enough for Me", the alphabet song, the list goes on and on...
2. He loves to play instruments. He makes drums out of anything he can, and he loves the drummer at our church, Mr. Matt. He plays Chris' keyboard whenever he can
3. He never crawled until his 1st birthday party. He did an army crawl for 12 months and on the day of his first birthday party, he picked himself up and crawled around the house.
4. He's only 3 years old and has already been in Oregon, Washington, North Carolina, Missouri, and all the states in between..he is a well-traveled little boy
5. Levi is a 100% daddy's boy, and I love that! (OK, sometimes I am slightly jealous of this fact)
6. He recognizes Michael Phelps when he's on Tv, even if he's not swimming...we were olympic obsessed this summer
7. He was in the 90th% at birth and is now in the 10th!
8. He's 3 years old and wears size 18month clothes!!
9. For the most part, he's a great big brother...for the most part
10.He can say the entire "Pledge of Allegiance"...which I can't even spell
11.He loves to read books, his favorite is a book called "HO HO HO Tucker", which is about a dog named Tucker (which is our dogs name)
12.He leaves a lasting impression on people...sometimes good, sometimes bad, but always memorable.

I leave you with some pictures of my sweet Levi, I love this boy!!! I can't wait to see how God will use his love of music, or even if that love will stick around.

How God's working on me...

2008-11-18T05:31:00.000-08:00

I have been convicted over the past week about the words I speak. I mean, majorly convicted. In one of those things that only God can do, our message on Sunday was all about the words we speak! Saturday night I was asking Chris where the passage that says "out of your mouth your heart speaks", or something. Can you imagine on Sunday when up on the screen pops Matthew 12:34 "...Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks..." can you just see me slinking further down into my chair as I feel God working on my heart?
I do not keep a close reign on my words, I hate to admit this, but I love to gossip. I am also extremely sarcastic, and I love to get a laugh (you're not surprised, are you?). The combination of gossip, sarcasm, and "humor" sometimes lead my words to be less than desirable.
One of the best examples of this is the way I talk about my children. And a very specific example comes from our small group on Thursday night. Someone asked me how the boys were and my immediate response was "annoying, but good". A while later we were marveling at how cute another group baby is and I said, "Oh I love this stage, then they get to my boys age and YUCK!"
I don't really mean those things. I love being a mom, I really do. And I love my boys, and all that they are. When I say things like that and hold it up to Matthew 12:34, I feel a need to do a heart check. If what comes out of my mouth is truly a reflection of my heart, then "change my heart O' God.
Another example of this is the way I talk about Chris. So often I say things to get a laugh or out of pure sarcasm, but they in no way show him respect or are uplifting to him. I always assume that people know I'm being sarcastic, but lately I've found that's not always the case. Again, I love my husband, I'm proud of him and proud to be his wife. But my words aren't always showing that.
I don't know if you've ever experienced a Sunday where you just know God is speaking to you, but oooo it is uncomfortable. And after that experience I feel so much more accountability to think that what I'm saying is a reflection of what my heart is, and to keep my words in check.
If you want to read more about this topic, some other verses that have been speaking to me are:
Matthew 12:34-37
James 3:1-12
James 4:11-12
Ephesians 4:29

November?

2008-11-12T18:53:00.000-08:00

Yes, that's November with a question mark. How in the world did we get into the middle of November already? Time is flying, and I know that by me saying that, it makes me "old", but I can't seem to wrap my mind around how fast time is passing (or seeming to pass, I guess).
Things have been quite busy in the Gray household. We went Trick-or-Treating with Chris' brother and his family (that is so not the accurate description for them...it should be with my best friend and her family, who happens to be Chris' brother and his family) and the kids loved it. Levi was a dinosaur and Mason was a frog. Levi went right up to the houses and said "Trick or Treat" and thank you, it was so fun watching him do it. I thought it would be so over his head, but he got it. Mason just stayed in the stroller and observed, but he looked good doing it.
Chris has been doing a lot of traveling for work, which makes for long days for me and the boys, I don't realize how much I depend on him until he's not here. For conversation, for a break after dinner, for bed time help, etc... We always manage, but I prefer him home...well, mostly I prefer him to have a job, so I won't complain.
I am just short of hitting 35lbs. lost! I don't know who even reads my blog anymore, so I've been hesitant to blog about my weight loss, but it's my blog, so if you don't like it, stop reading! My hope is to stay between 30-35lbs through the holidays and then in January try to loose the last 15-20...well, not all in January of course! I'm kind of addicted to exercising, which I never thought I would say. I exercise 5 times a week, doing cardio one day, then sculpting the next. I love it, I love how I feel after especially.
I've been working with a team of awesome women to put together a Christmas Outreach event for women. It's been so fun getting to know these women at our church and seeing how God has made us all so differently, with different talents and passions, yet together we can put together something so cool! (Ummm...I'm pretty sure that's in the Bible somewhere :D )
I hope things are going well for you during this busy time. I still haven't heard about that baby, Mel...is he here yet? And what is his name? And how are you? And how is big brother?
Enjoy these days, they're going fast! (Maybe that's because I've been going to bed at 9:00 every night...I'm so old!)

Happy 1st Birthday!

2008-10-28T04:13:00.000-07:00

See this guy? He turned 1 on Saturday! Man, oh Man, has time flown by. It seems like yesterday that I was waddling around trying to find my toes wondering if this was going to be Aubrey Paige or a boy with a name we hadn't figured out yet.
Mason LOVED getting into the cake! He had no reservations about picking up the entire piece and shoving it in his mouth. It was awesome...and messy!
Then he got thirsty, and decided he was done, but ohhh he was a MESS!
This was taken on Saturday before his party, just on our day at home.
Since Mason is 1 year old, 12 months, I wanted to take time to write down 12 things (pretty random things) that I think/love/pray for about this sweet boy. Remember, I'm his mom, so I'm quite biased...but it's MY blog, so I can be!

1. His first smile...I can see it so clearly, I was rocking him and nursing him in the morning and Chris came over to say good bye before work. As soon as Mason heard Chris he pulled off, looked up right into Chris' eyes and smiled. It was the coolest moment. There's something about the first on-purpose smile...and I didn't mind at all that it was for Chris!!
2. He loves to eat!! He is mommma's boy all the way on that one. This kid gets crabby if he's not in his highchair around breakfast time, lunchtime and dinner time. Yesterday I was at Panera bread with a friend and Mason reached right over to my try grabbed the 1/2 french baguette and started gnawing on it. This is after he ate 1/2 a grilled cheese; 1/2 a fruit cup; grahm crackers and bites of my soup!!!
3. He has a great personality at this age. This weekend we sang Happy Birthday to him 100 times, and every time we would start singing it he would stop whatever he was doing, smile a big smile and start clapping. He really has a great temperment and a fun outlook to his little world.
4. His eyes. They are truly the windows to his soul. They shine when he's happy, darken when he's angry and open really wide when something frightens him. Plus they are about the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen on a kid!
5. The fact that he's 1 and still has no teeth! I don't think much of it until I see our little friend Maya, who is 4 months younger and has quite a few teeth.
6. He loves cars. He will crawl around the house with a car in his hand for an hour at a time if nothing else distracts him. He pushes them on the carpet, carries them in his mouth, whatever it takes to have a car near him, he'll do it...any guesses where that comes from?
7. His pacifiers. If it's not a car, he's got a paci in his mouth and one in his hand, I've seen him have 2 in his mouth at one time, and now his favorite thing is to hide them around the house, which is no fun at all when he needs one for nap or to go in public, but it is funny to see all the strange places he hides them!
8. The way he mimicks things Levi does. Yesterday Levi was on the floor playing his little drum, Mason was watching him from a distance, then crawled over as soon as Levi walked away, sat down just like Levi was sitting and played the drum. Of course Levi flipped out, but Mason was cute just the same!
9. When he was 3-7 months he had the best hair. I called it a "baby-hawk" because it looked like a puffy mohawk right in the middle of his head. Now he just has a big boy haircut..
10. He was such a bad sleeper in the beginning. I remember thinking I'd be sleeping with this one until he was 10...
11. He's a GREAT sleeper now. 12 hours, in his crib, 2 naps, in his crib...PHEW!
12. We got off to such a bad start with him. The not-sleeping, the post-partum depression that led to me saying so many bad things about having him and ending up being away from him (and Levi) for a week..it was rough, but we survived, and I think I always look at him and think..."we conqured it!!! We're fine and it's all behind us!!"
I can't wait to see the life this little boy leads...he's such a treasure!

Reuniting

2008-10-13T19:21:00.001-07:00

I have to admit, I have become completely addicted to Facebook. I log onto my facebook page at least 5 times a day...which is because my laptop is always on and I'm always wandering past it sneaking a few minutes at a time online.
I love Facebook because it has given me an amazing opportunity to reunite with some people I honestly thought I'd never have in my life again this side of eternity. A year after high school I spent a semester at a Bible School thats main purpose is to train missionaries for tribal missions. During that time I made some intense freindships and then when I left, as time tends to do I lost touch with those friends. Thanks to facebook, I've reunited with a few of them and been able to catch up on their lives.
A year after my semester at Bible School, I packed up my white Ford Aspire and moved to Ozark Christian College in Joplin, MO. I lived in Dennis Hall on the first floor and I was a complete spaz surrounded by the most unforgettable girls I've ever met. Thanks to Facebook these girls: Lori; Eskai; Aline; Amy; Bridget; Kim; Laura; Becky; are now in my life again. I feel like over the past year I have seen their children grow (Lori and I have 2 boys, pretty close in age to each other), prayed for them, and laughed with them over old memories.
I only spent a year at Ozark, but my life was altered because of my parents divorce during that school year, and these women...who were just Godly girls then...pulled me through an overwhelmingly difficult time. I will never forget conversations and hugs and tears as I tried to understand what on earth was happening with my family.
I have to also give a shout-out to My Space because that's how I hooked back up with Melanie, my most faithful blog reader and commenter! We went to High School together, were sandwhich artists at Subway together, and I held a secret grudge against her because I was convinced she wanted my boyfriend and our fellow sandwhich artist Brian! (Sorry, Mel, the grudge is long-gone, but I figured it would add interest to our story :D ) Melanie is getting ready to have her 2nd son any week, so pray for her as you read this!
Anyway, I am now hoping to be able to actually see and laugh with these girls again really soon, and watch our kids enjoy each other and remember some of the craziness we shared. When that happens, It'll all be because of Facebook and Myspace...

A NEW kind of Friday Night Fun!

2008-10-04T19:07:00.000-07:00

It wasn't all that long ago that I was determined to have weekends filled with going out with friends, having friends over, or going to friends houses. Then...came my family! While I still REALLY enjoy nurturing our amazing friendships, I am learning to enjoy our family time so much more.
This last Friday we let Levi stay up past 8:00, Chris lit a fire and the 3 of us shared popcorn and played Candy Land and Chutes and Ladders. It was so cozy, so peaceful, and so much FUN!
Times like this are when I really feel God's ACTIVE presence in my life. While we were all sprawled out on the floor I could just hear God saying.."I love you so much, I heard your prayers, knew your dreams, read your diaries...and while in YOUR time it took a while to get here, my timing was perfect..and all of this...because I LOVE YOU!"
Here are some pictures of our game night! And since Mason was in bed, but not to leave him out, I included a picture of him too!

A funny memory!

2008-09-25T18:47:00.001-07:00

Tonight was our first night of small group, so today I was preparing the house for the babysitter(see previous post about cleaning out the junk drawer). While I was doing so, I was thinking of all the babysitting I used to do, how much I got paid, (1.50/hour, a good family paid 2.00/hour), and some of the terrible kids I got stuck with. This one memory came to mind and I've been laughing about it all day.
In high school I worked at a day care, and would often make babysitting jobs from day care clients. This very eccentric family had moved from England to the US for job reasons, they lived near my family, and their kids went to the day care I was working at. One Friday night, my friend Jill came along with me to babysit at this families house. We were hanging out while the kids were sleeping and looking for some movies to watch...you can see where this is going, right? They had this big grandfather clock in the living room that had a drawer in the bottom, Jill pulled it out to see if there were movies in there...oh yeah, there were movies...porn! a drawer full of porn! We were probably 16 or 17 and Jill and I were the funniest 2 girls to find porn, because we were so clueless. For the rest of the evening we would peek in the drawer and make fun of the covers...I mean, neither of us had seen a naked man before, so to us this was HILARIOUS!!!
We didn't watch or even want to watch any of the videos, but can you imagine what it was like for us to have to face this couple when they came home. We were so immature and clueless, we could hardly keep straight faces while talking to them.
That memory has been buried for about 12 years, and today it came up and I've been laughing about it ever since...
In case you're wondering, my biggest fear was having the sitter find my good chocolate...

Feeling like a "real" grown-up

2008-09-18T20:00:00.000-07:00

Levi will be turning 3 on November 3oth, and for the most part anytime we've needed babysitters it's been one of our parents, or a few times some church girls have come to watch him for an hour or two. I've never had to "hire" a babysitter that I didn't personally know, and have that first call talking about the boys, their schedule, etc...until tonight.
Our small group is going to be meeting on a night that my mother in law can't watch the boys (as she has in the past) so we decided to look for someone who could drive to our house on Thursdays to babysit. We didn't have to look too far, our small group leaders' daughter is available and going to do it for us. I've never met her before, so tonight I called her to give her the scoop on the boys. (Group starts next week).
Maybe this all seems weird to me because I was a babysitter all through high school and college, and it just feels so backwards to be the one saying, "Well, we have 2 boys, Levi and Mason, they go to bed at this time and do this, this and this...we'll be paying you this much..."
Hmm...as I type this, it sounds funny, but I really felt like a "MOM". You know? Maybe you don't, maybe I'm just being weird about it. But in my mind it feels like a year ago that I was the one listening to the mother drag on and on about bed times, snack times, diapers, and MOST IMPORTANTLY...how to work the remote control! And now I'm her...
Man...I was a really snoopy babysitter, too...I'd better go clean out the mail drawer...!!

2008-09-18T07:27:00.000-07:00

Here are some pictures! I have totally slacked and have so many on the camera that I need to upload and print. We are still completely lacking on pictures of Mason up and around the house!!

GRRRRRRRrrrrrr

2008-09-17T05:56:00.000-07:00

Nothing can ruin a day faster than...
a) Your 2 year old throwing a tantrum right after breakfast that lasts long enough for
b) Loosing your temper with your husband, who is just trying to get off to work so that he can provide for your family...which all leads to
c) a gigantic headache

Here's hoping your day is better than mine...and mine gets better after 9am

PS...Chris I'm sorry!!
PSS...Just as I was going to publish this, Levi came over, on his own, and said, "I'm sorry, Mommy. Sorry for crying"...there's hope after all!

Catching Up!

2008-09-16T10:13:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I've posted, but things have been quiet around here, so there's not much to blog about.
I've been engrossed in the series Gilmore Girls, on DVD. I have gotten the entire series and have been plowing through them season by season. I love the show! I saw glimpses of it when it was on TV, but found it annoying. A few of my friends have been trying to get me into it, so I figured the summer tv season was terrible anyway, and got started. It reminds me much of The Office (Coming back next week!) where you have to get involved in the characters and their quirks to catch all the humor. Anyway, so I've been watching that every chance I get.
I'm loving this fall weather. I went outside with Chris and the boys last night, and it even SMELLS good outside. I even really enjoyed the rainy weekend. I felt so cozy inside watching the rain fall. We had some friends over on Saturday night and had fun talking, eating, and drinking late night coffee.
Pumpkin Spice Lattes are back at Starbucks...mmmm...The Biggest Looser starts back up tonight, I'm going to watch it at a friends house tonight (probably makes me a big looser) with her...Grace Commerce(our Church) is finally in our new building and it looks awesome! I could (bur really already have) write an entire post about how much I love our church and it's people! ...Sonic, the best fast food on the planet, with the best drinks ever (vanilla dr. pepper!!) is moving in next to us, I"m so excited about that!
The kids are napping now, laundry is going, I've already worked out today, so I'm feeling strangely free right now! My next post is going to be a bunch of pictures that I've been meaning to post, all of the kids, of course!
Hope all is well with you, and your feeling the same contentedness that I'm enjoying in this season.

The 6th Love Language

2008-09-01T06:11:00.000-07:00

There is a pretty popular book called, "The Five Love Languages" written by Gary Chapman. I've read the book a few times, and the premise is that each person has a dominant "love language" that they use to express their love to others and that is the best way to express your love to that person, the way that lets them know you love them. The "languages" are Physical Touch, Gifts, Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Acts of Service.
A friend and I were talking about the book the other day and she asked me what my love language was. I said, "I don't know, it seems to change every time I read the book." I've been thinking about my love language since that conversation...and I think I've had a major revelation!
I'm pretty sure there is a 6th love language and it's....FOOD! And undoubtedly it's my Love Language. The following is a list of examples to support my theory, I'm considering e-mailing Mr. Chapman to tell him he needs to update his book...forward dedicated to MOI of course (or he could just send me some chocolate:D)
Examples: 1. My best friend Lindsay likes to drink the occasional Coke. They don't buy it because they don't drink it enough, so they don't usually have Coke in their house. Any time Lindsay and I meet at the park with our kids, or I go to her house, I bring her a Coke. It's my way of showing her that I care enough about her to bring her a "treat" that she doesn't usually have.
2. I LOVE it when Chris surprises me with going out to dinner or ordering in. Us going to dinner, or ordering in makes me feel special and loved.
3. Some of our friends from church were having their daughters wedding this past weekend. I had this plan to bring them some Bagels, a carton or two of soup and some pastries from Panera bread to their house so they would have some quick and easy food at their fingertips in the midst of all the chaos. It was my way of showing them that I was thinking of them and caring for them. (It didn't happen, but that's another post all together)
I have many more examples of times when either I have used food to cheer someone up, help them when they were sick, or just let them know that I care about them. On the same token, I have many examples of times when someone has brought me a meal and I have received their love in great ways.
What do you think? Is it possible that food is the undiscovered 6th language of love? What is your love language? Your spouses? How do you meet each others language?

Life-changing relationship

2008-08-21T20:47:00.000-07:00

When I was 15 years old, the church I grew up in hired our first Youth Pastor. At the time I was enjoying the fact that my parents said they would never make me go to church, so I wasn't going. On the first Sunday that Kyle and Cari Detmers and their young daughter, Chelsea came to church, my parents came home and said that I HAD to meet this guy, I would really like him.
So I went to church and met him and his wife, and that was the beginning of a relationship that has impacted me in ways that I will keep learning until eternity.
Yesterday, I went to that church, which is still like "going home" to me, and celebrated in sending Kyle, Cari and their 3 children off to Marquette Bible Church, in Marquette, MI. It was such a sad and draining day for me. The service was awesome. The celebration was great, and I think that the Detmers family was truly honored for their service to God.
I just had SUCH a hard time saying good-bye to them. I haven't seen them much since I've been married and moved out here, but I always knew where to find them. I always knew they would be there if I needed them for any reason.
When Chris and I were working with the Student Ministry at our old church, people would ask why we were doing it, my answer was always .. "because my youth pastor had such an impact on me, I want to do that for other students". We don't work with students any more because of our family, and the demands it would be on our time. But I hope that the time I did spend with some of the girls impacted them somehow.
One of the things I said yesterday during the service was, now that I'm a mom, I really understand the sacrifice Cari made to always keep her door open to me. I don't know how many hundreds of times I popped into their home un-announced, with I don't know how many hundreds of stupid reasons (usually about a boy!), and she always made time for me. I never considered her time, her family, the other aspects of her ministry, but it never seemed to matter. I will never forget that, and the impact it made on me will last forever.
I know that God is going to continue to complete His work in them and through them, and I'm excited to pack up my family and head to Marquette for some quality "family time" with the Detmers.
I love you guys, and I will never be able to thank you enough for all that you are in my life.

Good Friends!

2008-08-19T12:46:00.000-07:00

These are my friends Heather and Kim. We met about 6 years ago while working at the Jackson County Prosecutor's Office (or as I told our waitress last night, The County Jail). Heather was working there when I started and then Kim joined shortly after me. It didn't take long for us to form a bond and we have journeyed through so much in life during our years of friendship.
One thing is certain, when the 3 of us get together, there is no shortage of LAUGHTER! We met at The Melting Pot last night, in celebration of my birthday (AGAIN!). It never seems to matter how much time has passed from the last time we were together, we always pick up where we left off and have a great time.
I love these girls and am so glad that they are in my life, they are really great friends. (And I'm not just saying that because they paid for my dinner and lavished me with gifts...although it doesn't hurt) (WINK)

My hubs

2008-08-17T15:15:00.000-07:00

In case you don't know, this is me and Chris. Our 4 year anniversary is coming up fast (Sept. 4th), and it has been a whirlwind of a 4 years. I can't believe that we are celebrating 4 years of marriage and have 2 kids!! We got right down to business!
I just want to brag about Chris! He is such a great husband. And dad. He does so much for our family, and hardly ever complains, I love that about him. He is really corny and sometimes even I can't understand his jokes, and I imagine that one day he will be that dad whose corny jokes amuze and scare our sons girlfriends.
This picture was taken before our "hot date" on Friday night. We went to Outback, saw The Dark Night and then went and had "pie and coffee" at the Rams Horn. I don't think Chris cares at all about "Pie and Coffee" at 11:00 at night, but he likes to do things that I like. And it's quite obvious that I like "pie and coffee". So, there we were, sitting on the same side of the booth, sipping coffee and eating hot fudge cake at The Rams Horn in Novi. (I should note the only reason we sat on the same side of the booth is because we were watching Olympic Coverage).
Anyway, Chris, I love you, thanks for all you did to make me feel appreciated, loved and cared for on my birthday! You're the best!

6 things you don't know about me

2008-08-17T12:50:00.000-07:00

6 Things You Might Not Know About Me

My friend from Ozark Christian College, Eskai, tagged me for a game. So here are 6 things you might not know about me (although, I'm pretty open, so you probably do)

1. I read in the bathroom. ALL THE TIME! If I borrow books from you, and you don't want them read in the bathroom, you should let me know before lending them to me! I consider the bathroom the ONE place where I will have some peace and quiet to finish a chapter, a page, or the rest of a book.

2. I spend too much time in "idle" mode. It's something that I"m working on, but I have such a problem with idleness. I can easily waste an entire day, doing nothing except taking care of the kids, surfing the internet (especially blogs and facebook), and watching TV. It's sad...but true...and you probably DID know this about me!~!!

3. I usually have at least one laundry load that I have to wash twice because I leave it in the washer for too long.

4. I've never seen "Napoleon Dynamite". I have no desire to, either.

5. I talk to myself, like, a LOT! I have Pre-Conversation-Conversations with people, aloud, in the car, in the shower, wherever. Sometimes I think I've lost my mind, especially when a real conversation with the real person is NO WHERE near my pre-conversation-conversation with myself. Or when I get my own conversation confused with the conversation that ACTUALLY takes place

6. And lastly, I'm really sad about something. My Youth Pastor/second dad and his wife- my second mother/sister/friend, and their family are moving to Marquette, MI sometime soon. It's an odd thing that I am so sad about this, because I have seen them...maybe 5 times since I've been married, but I literally can't think about them moving without crying. I have been working on a post about this for some time, but I can't even seem to get my thoughts straight...it's crazy!

Hope you learned something new about me!

I'm supposed to "tag" other people who have blogs and have them do the same, but I don't know how to do all of that, so if you want to do this...then do it!

Happy Birthday to ME!!

2008-08-14T13:36:00.000-07:00

Turning 30 is awesome! I had the most amazing birthday yesterday, and the celebrating isn't even over yet. I need to set the day up with a few tidbits that might help you understand the greatness of the day.
1) For about 10 years, I have been obsessed with being the absolute queen of the day on my birthday
2) I'm almost always disappointed that, in fact, the world does NOT revolve around me on August 13
3) The plan for my 30th birthday was...a park outing with my Lindsay and Cyrus and Ayla, followed by lunch...dinner at home with the fam..with other events and gathering throughout the week planned.
So, here's how the day unfolded...I woke up and Chris was in the shower getting ready for work, then I went in the bathroom and when I came out Chris and the boys were sitting on our bed with a big box all wrapped up in front of them. I was NOT expecting a present, and I certainly was not expecting ... A KEURIG coffee maker!! YAY! I had mentioned wanting one a time or two, but never thought I'd get it!! OHHH, I've been having some good coffee these past 2 days, have I mentioned I love me some coffee? Then the card said that I get the day to myself, because Chris wasn't going to work! We had been talking about my need for shopping for new clothes and that got to be my day for it!
It didn't take me long to get out of the house and be on my way for a day of shopping, lunching, maybe a movie! I got my guilty pleasure breakfast..(.DON'T JUDGE, but I love "Sausage, Egg, and Cheese McGriddles" from McD's, and it was my birthday so I indulged! )..then set out to the mall. I went to my favorite store, Ann Taylor Loft, bought a pair of jeans, a shirt and a sweater. Then went to more stores, tried on more clothes and actually enjoyed myself at the mall.
I then met my friend Courtney for lunch at Border Cantina Mexican restaurant, where she bought me lunch and a margarita...nothing like booze in the afternoon. Then I wondered through a few more stores, and headed to see what was at the theater. I ended up seeing, Mama Mia! I have this weird thing, I actually ENJOY seeing a movie by myself. But...not this one. I'm not too crazy about musicals, and I really liked the story line, AND I like Some ABBA in my life, but it was too much for me. Alone. If I had a friend sitting by me while Dancing Queen was on, I think it would've created a fun moment. Glad I saw it, but I won't see it again!
After my movie I wandered through Target and then came home. All 4 of us went to Red Robin for dinner, Levi loves it there, and it's loud enough we don't feel bad if the kids sqwak a little. It was a great dinner, and just overall one of my best birthdays ever.
I'm just narcissistic enough, that I might post pictures of my clothes...maybe even with me in them, but for now, here's a picture of my Keurig, I LOVE IT!!! Come on over and I'll make you a cup of some GOOD coffee!!!

A nugget tucked away...

2008-08-12T09:14:00.000-07:00

I found this verse a few months ago tucked into the gospel of Luke, and I have been pondering it ever since, here it is along with my thoughts. If you can add your own insight to this passage, I'd love to hear it.
Luke 22:31-32 (Jesus is talking) "Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."
This is one part of the conversation Jesus and Simon (also called Peter) have during the Passover Supper (or the Last Supper). It's where Jesus tells Peter that "before the rooster crows, Peter will deny Jesus 3x.
Here are the things that struck me as I have read this passage and mulled over it.
1) "Simon, Simon" I love the tenderness in Jesus using Simon's name twice. I can just hear His tone (as I think it might have sounded), not harsh, not condemning, but filled with tenderness as He warns His disciple of what is to come.
2) "satan has asked..." For some reason, I get so much comfort from knowing that Satan had to ASK to come against Simon. (Just like he did Job) I wonder what it was about Peter that made him such a target for Satan, I mean, why did he specifically ask for him?
3) "but I have prayed for you" This is JESUS praying for one of His disciples. It amazes me that Jesus intercedes for us. I don't know much about the theology behind this, but in my "theological" mind, I am in awe of Jesus interceding on MY behalf. I think of times that I've gone through struggles and trials, and I look back so differently thinking that Jesus was praying for me.
4)"And when you have turned back"...This is probably my favorite part. Not, "if you make it through", Not, "good luck to you, man"...but "WHEN you have turned back". Jesus is giving Simon a glimpse into the future and a knowledge that he will get through whatever it is that Satan will put him through.
Those are just some of my thoughts on this passage that I have somehow managed to miss in years and years of reading the gospels. This comes to mind so often when I hear of someone struggling with something. I've been trying to find sermons and talks on this verse, but so far haven't found much that gives me further input than my own simple mind.

And Panera!

2008-08-05T12:24:00.001-07:00

After enjoying a delicious lunch today with one of my longest friends, Courtney (We've known each other since Kindergarten), I realized that needed to add something else to my "things that I love"! And that would be Panera Bread! Chris thinks it's too pricey, so I don't go very often, but if that place had a drive-through window, oh baby! In case you're wondering, todays enjoyment was...Strawberry Poppyseed Salad (no cxn); and 1/2 chxn salad on whole grain (You pick 2)! I could make a whole post about what I love at Panera, it would look like this..*Portobella Mozzerlla Panini*cinnamon french toast bagel with Hazelnut cream cheese*cream cheese danish*Vegetarian black bean soup*bread bowls*iced coffees*broccoli chedder soup* Ummm....just read the menu and that's what I love!!!

A few of my favorite things

2008-08-04T17:56:00.000-07:00

Over the past few weeks I've found myself using something or doing something, and thought, "Oh, I love this" or something similar, so here is a random list of those things...they may be boring to you, but they're my little pleasures right now!
*Daily phone call with Lindsay*Blogging*facebook*our church*new friendships*Old friendships*reuniting with old friends via facebook*the Mole (which ends tonight:(*watching Mason learn new things daily*watching Levi learn about life*hearing Levi pray*that my kids go to bed at 8:00*naptime*wearing a size 12 again*Jon and Kate + 8*my homemade iced coffee*exercising and feeling good*cuddling with the kids*cuddling with Chris*Pancake Saturdays*reading blogs of friends*reading blogs of strangers that inspire me*coffee*finding new recipes and trying them out*connecting with new friends*switching Mason from baby food to table food*Coke Zero*The Melting Pot*My nieces and nephews*my minivan (never thought I'd say that)*watching the boys sleep*watching movies with Chris*my new relationship with my mom*Costco*playing cribbage with Chris*being referred to as "The Grays" (I can't explain why, but I love it when someone calls us the Grays)*Project Runway*MY FAMILY!!

He's not the only one

2008-08-03T18:29:00.000-07:00

I had to add this moment from today as a follow-up to my post about Chris playing Keys at church today. This afternoon Levi was downstairs while Chris was grilling our dinner and I was feeding Mason. Out of nowhere, I heard Levi playing the keyboard (he's figured out how to turn it on, "play it", and turn it off), and a small voice accompanying the banging on the keys. I went to the top of the stairs and heard Levi singing, "You're enough, You're enough for meeee, You're enough, You're enough for meee". Which is one of the songs that Chris played this weekend. You know that song, "Buckaroo" by Rodney Atkins, that song is so Chris and Levi. They have such a cool relationship, Chris is just an amazing dad, and seeing Levi with him (and Mason, in time) just proves that! I am beyond blessed with my family!

My husband's talent

2008-08-03T09:59:00.000-07:00

Today Chris was back at the Keys again! Since we've made the move, about a year ago, to Grace Commerce, Chris has taken time off from playing music at church. I know the music team (led by very good friends of ours) has been wanting him to play, but they were so respectful of our need to have some time to focus on our family and "rest".
It was so great for me to see him back behind the keys again! He has such an amazing, God given talent, and when he's leading people in worship it's hard not to see that he's connecting with God on a level I'll never know. (But, oh how I wish I could sing so I could know that connection!)
I am so glad that God has brought us to this church. We have made amazing friends, been challenged Spiritually, and seen God work in our lives in awesome ways during our time at Grace. I can't wait to see what lies ahead for us in our family, with our friends, and most importantly as we both work towards becoming the people that God has created us to be.

Fun Stuff!

2008-07-22T19:08:00.000-07:00

I'm getting my stretchy pants out and ready for some GREAT fun this week/weekend! Thursday night I have organized a "Fondue fun night" for the women at our church. We have about 20 women coming and will have all the fondue goodness a woman could ever want. While we have only been attending Grace Commerce for just about a year, we have already made some great friendships, and I'm looking forward to deepening those friendships around a pot of warm chocolaty heaven!
And, as if one night isn't enough...Saturday night we will be having dinner at my own personal version of heaven on earth, THE MELTING POT! with our friends Kevin and Allison, to celebrate Allison's birthday.
One might wonder if this is too much fondue for one person...umm...there is no such thing as too much fondue, not in my book anyway.

A missed opportunity

2008-07-15T11:24:00.000-07:00

Yesterday at the post office something powerful was taking place right before my eyes. Something I've blogged about doing but instead I did the opposite and ran from an opportunity that God might have placed right in my lap. (GRRR-I hate it when I do that, yet I do it so often!)
Anyway, I had a package to mail so I had the boys in the double stroller knowing that I would be in there for a while trying to put the package together. When we walked through the door these two young boys, probably 6 & 8 - ish, ran in front of us, yelling and chasing each other through the post office. The line for the counter was about 5 people deep and the mother of these two boys was at the counter talking to an employee while simultaneously yelling at her children who were on the other side of the building banging into mailboxes. Everyone in the line was giving the lady dirty looks, rolling their eyes at the children and making comments to each other about how terrible they were. I was thinking how great my boys were and what the heck is this ladies problem letting her kids be banshees in the post office.
Fast-forward 15 minutes (full of chaotic boys running back and forth (NOT MINE, they were sitting happily in the stroller)), I am now at the front of the line and the mother is talking to a manager of the post-office. I start eavesdropping on the conversation and hear that she is going through a divorce, her husband is stealing her mail, she has to go into hiding because he is abusive to her...and then I don't hear anymore because I'm finally at the counter. She was still at the counter when I went out to the van, and as I was driving away she was in the doorway of the post-office yelling, no screaming at her boys to get out before she "beats their asses". I contemplated the entire time I was witnessing this unfold, asking her how I could help her.
My heart was breaking for these boys, who are most likely acting out due to their family falling apart, and it was breaking for this mom, who was obviously at her limit. I said a quick prayer for her and left the post office. It's almost like it's haunting me now. I can't forget the scene, the embarrassment on the woman's face, the look of the angry customers at her obnoxious children, the boys. I should have done something. I should have offered something to her. I don't know what, but I really feel like I've missed an opportunity that was right before me.
Now, go back to my blog about the hurt in this world...At the end I said "Lord, help me to see these people and help"...and I didn't! I hate when I do this, but I have story after story of times where I KNOW God is at work doing something and I let fear of rejection or looking stupid take over me.
Pray for me, that I will be not only aware of the hurt surrounding me but that I would TAKE ACTION! And mostly pray for this poor family. I don't know what or how you should pray for them, but God knows, listen to his prompting.

Mason Crawls, Swear Police and Potty Success

2008-07-10T14:52:00.000-07:00

Here is a video of Mason crawling, in case you'd like to see my prodigy at work :D (I am SO becoming one of THOSE parents)
We have been in the process of teaching Levi that there are words that he can't say. We reached this phase one night when at dinner he said "Darn it", followed by "Crap", followed by "Shut Up". All my words...lovely. Of all the profound things that come out of my mouth on a daily basis, Levi picks up those words. Nice. Anyway, we went through the spiel, you don't say those words, only happy words, blah blah blah. Since then he is quick to let you know if you say one of those words, "Mommy (or whomever else is talking) don't say that word, only happy words." Yesterday, King of Queens was on the TV and Carrie used the word "crap". Levi stopped doodling on his magna-doodle, looked up and said, "TV don't say that word, only happy words, TV". Off went the TV. It was so funny!
Today we took a trip to Target and bought Levi a Potty Chair (which he calls a "potty train" and big boy underwear). Oh, and a big bag of M&M's for reward. He's never sat on the toilet or anything before, and so far today he's gone pooped twice...*OH, I just cringed...I AM one of THOSE PARENTS, blogging about my child's bowel movements* (Oddly enough, I'm not deleting)!

Pictures!

2008-07-10T11:04:00.001-07:00

Levi's first fishing trip

The Gray family

I love this picture!

Feeding the goats at Grant's Farms.

In Missouri

2008-07-03T09:39:00.000-07:00

Today's blog is brought to you from Farmington, MO. We're really enjoying our vacation and time with "papa mike and jo-nanna". (Jo-nanna is my dad's wife, Joanna) As you can see from the pictures, we've been enjoying the swimming pool a lot! Levi even did some "swimming" on his own. He had two of the swim noodles propped under his arms like skis and floated around on his tummy. I'm really surprised that he wears the Superman floaty thing.
Yesterday we went to Grant's Farms. It's a small zoo with a train that you ride around and see deer, elk, etc...wondering around. Then there's a small area with a few animals. We saw an elephant, camels, and Levi spent some time in the petting zoo feeding the goats from a bottle (I'll post pictures of that later).
We're really having a great time and aren't sure if my dad is going to let us leave or not! He's really enjoying Levi and Mason and getting to see their personalities and interaction.
Oh! And Chris and I got to get away and go to a par3 golf course. I have only real golfed one time and that was over 5 years ago. I actually got PAR on one of the holes. We had a lot of fun doing that together!!

Funny (and Cute) Story

2008-06-27T11:07:00.000-07:00

...Well, it's actually mostly cute. Today in preparation for all of our happenings, I went to get the van washed at the automatic car wash. Levi has had a fear of the car wash for quite some time, but recently has become a bit more brave when we drive through it. Mason on the other hand, has remained quite oblivious to the experience. Today while we were waiting in line to enter the car wash, Levi kept saying (with a quiver in his voice), it's not too scary mommy, it's not to scary. Then as we pulled up and the guys (who I think ARE quite scary) started doing the pre-wash, Levi said, "I like the car wash". At that moment, Mason (who is experiencing quite a bit of stranger anxiety, especially with males) notices the car wash attendant outside his window and looses it. An all out, hyperventilating cry. Levi looks over at Mason and says, "Mason it's OK, it's not too scary". And repeats it over and over like a mantra. While he's trying to convince his brother (who calms down as soon as the attendant walks away), it's obvious that he is trying very hard to be brave himself and the quiver in his voice is very apparent.
Meanwhile I was sitting up front blinking back tears at what I've just witnessed. It's one of the first, and very rare, times that Levi has shown pure care and compassion for Mason. I just loved listening to him with that "trying to be brave quiver" repeat over and over, "It's OK Mason, it's not too scary"...oh, these moments make me LOVE being a mother!
Well, just wanted to share that, now it's back to packing!

The Fun is about to begin!

2008-06-26T11:03:00.001-07:00

Today is the last "normal" day around here for a while. Tomorrow we are celebrating Chris' birthday at the Tigers game with DJ and Lindsay. Our neighbor Steve, who works for the Organization, got us great seats, row 9 of the Tigers Dugout. All four kids are going to stay at grandma and gramps Gray's house, overnight! It should be a really fun night and will be a great way to celebrate Chris' birthday.
Saturday we are going to pick up the boys and then heading to Peoria, Ill. in route to St. Louis and my dad's house. We'll be meeting up with my college friend Bridget and her family on Saturday evening and then Sunday we'll be off to Farmington, MO., aka: Pappa Mike's house. We're looking forward to just hanging out with my dad and Joanna (or as Levi has named her Jo-nanna) and their pool. We're hoping for a nice relaxing time together, but with a two year old and 8 month old, "nice and Relaxing" is sometimes very hard to find!

Funny

2008-06-24T12:31:00.000-07:00

This is what Levi was up to today! Sometimes I wonder how he even thinks about doing something like this. The picture's not great quality wise, but I wanted to quickly snap a shot before he realized I was watching him! `

A hurting world

2008-06-23T10:31:00.001-07:00

On my blog list on the right, I have two blogs listed that I have become quite familiar with. I can't even begin to explain (it's a long and random story) how I found out about these blogs, but they are both very meaningful to me. One is the story of a mother who found out the baby she was carrying, her 4th daughter, would never survive outside her womb. (audreycaroline.blogspot.com) The other is the story of a 3 year old girl, named Eve, who was recently diagnosed with Lukemia. I have spent hours in the past few weeks reading about these stories, laughing and crying with these strangers who the only thing I have in common with them, is motherhood.
These stories have changed the way I view this world. They (and many others I have heard recently) have reminded me of the state of this fallen place we live in. I look at people so differently now. I think about the lady in the grocery store whose child is running rampant while she hogs the one freezer door I need. I actually try to think...I have no idea what is going on in this woman's life. What sort of pains she is experiencing right now, they may be none, but I don't know that. It makes me think twice about letting some comment or loud sigh escape my lips.
I remember when I was in the midst of my battle with post-partum depression. Right before I was hospitalized. My in-laws were watching our boys and Chris and I went to Costco to stock up on our monthly groceries. I was walking through that store with severe anxiety, thinking that I wouldn't make it through the line without either having a panic attack or sitting down and bawling right there in the midst of the ginormous toilet paper rolls. I was in so much pain that day, so unaware of anything around me, I might have been "putzing" in front of a freezer door, or blocking someones path, but I was oblivious because my mind was falling apart.
I try to remember that time when I see people now. I know that there are so many hurts in this world that we live in, we just don't know who or where they are. I want to learn how to show Christ's love to these strangers. I want to help them in someway see, that this pain, this financial struggle, this abandonment, whatever they are facing is temporary. Because Jesus has promised that He's preparing a place for us. A place where "He [God] will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." Rev. 21:4.
Lord, open my eyes to the pain around me. Show me how to reach out and comfort those who you have put in my path who are hurting. Mostly, help me to be obedient to your prompting and act when you call me to act.

50 things you never needed to know

2008-06-22T16:39:00.000-07:00

(1) Favorite hobby? ughhh...I hate this question because it really makes me wish I had a hobby! Unless reading counts as a hobby, I don't have one.

(2) How do you feel about your ex? I don't have a significant enough "ex" to feel anything about

(3) Do you own guns? No

(4) What flavor do you add to your drink at sonic? This question makes me mad because there is no SONIC around here...in this state, even. BUT, in my year at Ozark Christian College I became quite familiar with the SONIC (hence my anger at not having one near me), and I LOVE vanilla dr. pepper and Cherry Limeaids

(5) Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? always

(6) What do you think of hot dogs? I like them

(7) Favorite Christmas song? The Cradle Prayer by Rebecca St. James, It's such a beautiful song

(8) What do you prefer to drink in the morning? COFFEE...I have become quite the Coffee addict, in fact, maybe coffee can be my hobby

(9) Can you do push ups? the girlie kind, but I'm getting better

(10) Can you do a chin up? I haven't tried in a while, but I doubt it

(11) What's your favorite piece of jewelry? my engagement ring

(12) Do you like blue cheese? I don't really like it

(13) Ever been in a car wreck? 2 times

(14) Do you have ADD? It's not out of the question

(15) What's one trait that you hate about yourself? I am so sensitive (but I think I hide it quite well)

(16) Middle name? Marie

(17) Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment? 1) I'm really glad that I have this "break" right now 2) I can't wait to celebrate CHris' birthday with our AWESOME seats at the Tigers game and our best friends, DJ and Lindsay 3) I have so much to do before we go to St. Louis and visit my dad

(18) Name 3 things you bought yesterday? 1) a new shirt for Chris 2) a birthday card and the rest of Lauren's birthday gift 3) baby food

(19) Name 3 drinks you regularly drink? 1) Coffee 2) Water 3) Coke Zero

(20) Current worry? Chris and Levi who are on an "Adventure Walk" right now and Chris just called to say the park was much further than he thought...*sigh*

(21) Current hate right now? All of the pain in this world

(23) How did you bring in the New Year? with DJ and Lindsay

(24) Where would you like to be right now? At the Melting Pot!!!!

(25) Do you like bok choy? Yep

(26) Do you own slippers? yes

(27) What shirt are you wearing? a purple t-shirt

(28) Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? Not at all.

(29) Can you whistle? no

(31) Would you be a pirate? umm..no

(32) What songs do you sing in the shower? Shout to the Lord is my current shower hit for the moment

(33) Favorite girl's name? Aubrey Paige (it would've been Mason's if he was a girl)

(34) Favorite boy's name? Levi Mason (apparently such a person exists whose first name is Levi and last name is Mason)

(35) What is in your pocket? Nothing

(36) Last thing that made you laugh? I was "chatting" with a long lost college friend via Facebook and she brought up a sweatshirt that I may or may not have borrowed/stolen from her 9 years ago, I had forgotten all about that, but I LOVED that sweatshirt (which is why I borrowed/stole)

(37) Best bed sheets as a child? I have no idea

(38) Worst injury you ever had? The post labor "injuries" were quite traumatic (and you can only roll your eyes if you've naturally (with an epidural though) delivered a 9lb 10oz baby your first time)

(39) Do you like where you live? For the moment, but oh, how I'm longing for Heaven

(40) How many TVs do you have in your house? 3

(41) Who is your loudest friend? Courtney Feurstien, and it's what I love about her!

(42) How many dogs do you have? Just one, Tucker

(43) Does someone have a crush on you? Someone better, or I'll have no reason for squeezing out two kids.

(44) Favorite book? I love the Mark of The Lion Series by Francine Rivers, it's life-changing

(46) What is your favorite candy? Reses Pieces !

(47) Favorite Sports Team? Detroit Tigers

(48) What song do you want played at your funeral? We Will Dance (it's a praise and worship song) AND "IF You Could See Me Now"

(49) What were you doing at 12 AM last night? Sleeping

(50) What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up today? We are going to be late for Church...again *sigh*

My Boys

2008-06-19T13:18:00.000-07:00

Pretty much for as long as I can remember, I've wanted to be a wife and a mother. If I was asked what I wanted to be when I grew up I would say, "A teacher, but only if I can't be a mom and wife". Now that I'm in this reflective state of mind, I think about what that 13 year old girl would think if she saw me now (Kind of like that Brad Paisley song, "Letter to Me") After the initial dissapointment that I never did marry one of the New Kids On The Block, I think me at 13 would be very happy with me at 30.(almost). I still have some of my best friends from that time in my life, Jill, Melissa Heaton and Courtney Feurstien. Our lives have changed and thus our friendships are all different and much more infrequent times together, but they're still a special part of my life.
Then I look at my family. I have a husband who exceeded any of my dreams and expectations, (even including Jordan Knight from NKOTB) and 2 healthy, beautiful boys. And I'm making it...as a mom...as a wife. I think I'm doing pretty well at it too. Sure, there are days when dinner is a hot dog and can of corn, and mornings when Chris has to revert to his "spare drawers" because once again, I've gotten behind on the laundry. There are times when I say "I love this stage of life" and then times when I "can't wait for this time of life to be over". But I know that it won't be long before Levi doesn't want to cuddle with me anymore and I'm not his friend anymore, and soon Mason won't light up when I walk in the room and cry when I'm out of his sight. So for right now, this day, this week, this moment, I'll try to be content and happy with where I've ended up, because I know that the 13 year old Tonya with Penny-rolled pants and Canvas Keds would be really pleased to see herself now!

Trying again

2008-06-18T19:36:00.000-07:00

So, this is my 2nd attempt at a blog. My first one didn't get any further than a post and Chris reading it, so I'm trying again. I was listening to the Tim McGraw song, "My Next 30 Years today" and I thought, "Oh, I'm there...turning 30...what will these next 30 years be for me, my family?". I started thinking thoughts like, "In 30 years...I'll be 60...Chris will be 61...Levi will be 33...Mason 30...my dad 82...mom 81...etc..etc...etc.."
I've tried so many times to keep journals, prayer journals, journals for the boys, but I'm such a better typer than writer, so I've decided this blog will just contain all of my ramblings, thoughts, happenings etc.
I have no idea if anyone will read this, or if anyone really cares what's going on in my head, but here it is for anyone who cares...enjoy!